Texas Tompkins

Audiobooks

2012-02-01T09:11:00.002-06:00

Somewhere along the way I read the first half of The Well Trained Mind. While there are many, many suggestions in there about how to train your child's mind the first (maybe only?) one that I employed was naturally the easiest. Get audiobooks from the library and play them for your kid. Of course this isn't to substitute for reading aloud to him, but it gives him so much more exposure than I could ever hope to give. This idea isn't new, I'm sure, but what struck me was the level of book the author suggested for a four year old. Full, long books were encouraged, as a pre-schooler's listening and comprehension level is far beyond his speech level. So, our very first audiobook was Charlotte's Web back when Molly was four. I nervously put on the story, told her it was room time, and waited. And waited, and waited, and waited. She never came out. She listened to Charlotte's Web at least ten times while we had it from the library. And so it begun.
Not every one of my kids has enjoyed the long novel as much as she did at that age. But there are tons of options to help them ease into listening, and each kid has different preferences. Charlotte could listen to A-Z Mysteries all day, and in fact, she did yesterday. However, she's also enjoyed The Enchanted Castle, the Chronicles of Narnia, and the Penderwick series. They both have. Ryan did read Narnia to them first, which helped with pauses for q&a.

I'm just getting started on this with Lewis, because of course, poor third child gets forgotten. Thanks to Mom for the gentle reminder. He's enjoying Paws & Tales so far as well as The Jesus Storybook Bible (the deluxe version has beautiful audio cd's). And now, for the truth of this moment, his recorded Disney channel show is about to pause and I'm feeling that I should run and actually read to him "live" for a few. Indeed!

Nick Jr Narrative

2012-01-31T22:18:00.000-06:00

So I'm watching My Little Pony with this one, and the bad ponies from out of town are about to win the cider making contest. There's no way little ma & pa farm can compete. Towards the climax I ask Charlotte who she thinks will win--the bad guys have this huge, industrial cider machine. She calmly answers me, "The little ponies will win." Why do you think so I ask. "Because this show is about the My Little Ponies so they will win. They always win, just like Jake and the Neverland Pirates, like Dora, like Scooby-Doo, like them all. If it's about them, they win."

This makes me wonder what the rest of the world's cartoons are like. Could this be related at all to that Brooks article last year--about how some crazy percentage of us think we're leaders and above average? I mean, in our own head, our story is about ourself. And if the story is about me, I should win (according to my kid's shows). To win, I've got to be a winner. Therefore, I'm a winner and really good at stuff. Because it's about me.

Daddy Daughter Dance

2012-01-29T21:23:00.002-06:00

Thankful for these great dads and their wise, loving parenting! (And thankful for their persistent reminders to buy tickets to the Dance. Thanks, Wade & Dave and whoever else helped in the process.) It is no small thing watching our kids grow up with good friendships.

Needless to say, Lewis was a little sad....until he heard about his mommy, son play date. A cheese spread for dinner (his favorite) among other foods, cookie baking, penguin movie upstairs (all with Calvin)...and Cheetos to boot. Wonder which parent made out the best here?

Yes, if you ate the cookie bars this AM at Trinity Harbor, they were made by these two! But Rae's supervision was impeccable, and fortunately, they were both a little obsessive about washing their hands after each step. No gooey hands for these boys!

Good News for Most

2012-01-23T15:13:00.004-06:00

This may be the first cosmetology article I've ever read. Most of it I love: bed head, smudged makeup, recession friendly tools, and best of all--out with the perfection look. Note the popsicle mouth description. Love it. Maybe my new "coming home from the party" look will make up for a lack of partying these days.

I've been anticipating this trend for a while now.
Marian Adrian Photography

But a few points leave me confused, and I quote, "Even that old standby, the smoky eye, is out of vogue. “Lose the smoky eyes,” said Mr. Barber of MAC. For a fresh look, he suggests swiping brown mascara just on the roots of your eyelashes, then dotting a bit of brown pencil in between (he likes MAC Coffee eye pencil). This year, texture, like metallic or wet eyelids, is all the rage. The total effect, he said, is “modern pared-down glam rock.” Ms. Hamlin agreed. “The smoky eye will never go out of style, but a different way to use it is to use the metallic tones,” she said. “It just makes it a little bit softer.”"

The smoky eye is out of vogue. The smoky eye will never go out of style. Oh, add glitter. I think I get it. Guess I'm in the clear either way. And so my fashion inquiries go.

Regardless, it's a fun article, even if the models in the slideshow look like they've spent six hours in the makeup and hair chair, not in bed. NY Times Article: You Can Fall Out of Bed and Look Good

Hidden Treasures

2012-01-19T22:24:00.001-06:00

I love it when I'm on a mission to find something new only to discover that the "new" thing is here in my house. This happened last year with lip gloss--I was gathering up whatever I had, anticipating that I would be spending some cash on a new shade, seeing as how all my known old ones were empty. While making effort to find any remnants, I looked in all the usual places--a coat pocket, spring purse, car console, retired diaper bag, shoe in closet, and the key drawer. Lo and behold I had an entire bag full of lip gloss. That's what ten minutes of intentional effort will get you I guess.
In similar fashion, the past week has led me to realize that we need a new format for the kids' character building time. There are enough issues coming up that I want definitive answers to point to. So, I talk to people, google books, ask around--sure enough, I go through our bookshelves and find exactly what I need--My ABC Bible Verses. It's one of those books (like so many) that I'd relegated to the "we're past that" shelf. Really, most of these books that we think we're past are often just perfect for where we are. Indeed is true of this one (thanks Kari Jo!!). It's been perfect for a once a day reading time, and its level is appropriate for all three kids. Even better, I delegate this to Ryan at the dinner table, so my job is done. If you know me, you know that delegating is my gift.
Speaking of books that we're "past," I just reread Mere Christianity for the third time. This was THE time! First time: senior year in college, Fran's diner & all that that entails. Conclusion: I don't get this book. Hard! But I want to. Second time: Hmmm, very interesting stuff. Not as hard as before. Third time: I am floored that what he is describing is what I've been living & experiencing for the past 5-20 years. It all makes sense; not that I'm fully arrived (indeed!), but C.S. Lewis here describes what I've heard, seen, experienced from my teachers & community, and I am blessed. Seeker or Believer, Read This Book. I'll read it with you. What quote to even choose? Here's a short one: "My argument against God was that the universe seemed so cruel and unjust. But how had I got this idea of just and unjust? A man does not call a line crooked unless he has some idea of a straight line. What was I comparing this universe with when I called it unjust?"
Good stuff. Thankful for hidden treasures.

somehow this is the version I have!

Thank You Post

2012-01-19T21:38:00.003-06:00

So my parents gave me a great camera for Christmas, and my dad requested more blog posts since I'll have some sweet image capability. Of course, the user behind the camera counts for most of the skill or lack thereof. I've always just relied on my brother & sister's skills, but hopefully I can capture a few more everyday moments. Posted here are a few pics from Christmas, especially as I'm going to be seeing my dad tomorrow. Thank you for the camera!!!
Of course lots of things have happened before & after Christmas--in fact I don't think I ever wrote about Tompkins Christmas, which we renamed Thanks, Christ. This is due to the fact that we celebrated Thanksgiving & Christmas all in the same weekend. I think we're all still recovering. No, really, it was a great way to have all the far flung family together for some serious celebrating. Now that seems like a year ago!!
And, of course, the BU bowl game--a treat for me to attend with just my parents & Justin and Amber. I've never seen such Bear fever, and with good reason--we take it when we can get it! Sic Em.
So, there's Nov-Dec in the quickest of nutshells. In my systematic world, if I want to go forward in blogging I have to give some kind of recap. Happy New Year!

Sic Em

Thanks, Christ Table
Gus Rios

Thanks, Christ Kid's Table (1st Time Ever)
Gus Rios

Let the Cooking Begin

2011-11-21T23:22:00.001-06:00

After fighting everyone else in Rockwall who had to go to the grocery today, I returned to my gracious husband who spent his day off with the crew. Tonight I tried a new granola recipe, and I'm trying pumpkin butter for the first time ever--never had it, but the description sounds too good to be true. Smitten Kitchen. As some of you know, I've been on the quest for the perfect granola for a while. Unfortunately, my kids' feedback is never quite what I would hope for.

I also found myself on SK's Thanksgiving page. While I may not make any of these, I am tempted to. Is attempting an onion tart on the morning of TDay too big a feat for the arrival of the weary travelers? Note, I have never used yeast before. Smitten Thanksgiving.

Thanks to Joanna M. for the gingerbread pita chips & pumpkin dip recipe which will surely be the hit, especially for all my sweet toothies. I think Charlotte ate her weight in this last Saturday after the women's brunch. And, Andrea, this turkey thanks you. I am reminded of the last time I was in charge of the turkey (1999). I spent the entire morning on the phone with Deb T., Deb C., and my mom. Not much has changed I guess.

It's food time!!

One Stop Shopping

2011-11-18T22:18:00.001-06:00

Sweet girls working hard on their projects! Charli is now making awesome bows in order to send a kid or two to school in Ethiopia. She's got skills! And she's got two pages full of orders already from school. But, if you know someone who needs a cute bow for an unbeatable cause, let me know. ($.50 small bows, $1 large (small for these parts)) I'm passing along orders. Love these girls!

Stocking Stuffers with a Purpose

2011-11-07T17:19:00.003-06:00

So Molly's caught the vision & actually done something about it!

What are her skills? Among other things, beading.
What are two of her complaints? School & homework.
New information I happened to give her: Only half the world's children are able to attend school.
Her small scale solution: Send a child or two in Ethiopia to school.

How can you participate? Order a bracelet or two. $2 each.

Thanks to Justin's buddies, she's halfway to 1 child! I always knew you SAE's were full of compassion.

Is it legit? We're sending funds here: One Child Campaign

Comment or email me if you want some jewels. Custom requests welcome.

Growing Up Together

2011-11-07T16:57:00.000-06:00

We had a great community group last week--it stood out as a most vulnerable one--and I've been in groups for a long time! Since the India/Ethiopia trip & updates so many of us have been throwing around the question in our minds--what can I do!? In fact, I know that lots of us have wrestled with this question for a long time in light of our teaching. One of our guys just threw it out there--he wants to see himself as the rich American that he is instead of the middle class wage earner that he also is. This is not easy! We were encouraged that this will be both an individual endeavor as well as a group project--Ryan shared some really tangible vision--he would love to see us grow as a church in people & in budget. Then, the challenge--for THC to stay almost as simple as we are now & use half our budget to give away toward new creation in the lives of the world's poorest. That was something we could grasp & be encouraged by. Practicing discipline in spending, frugality, and simplicity is not easy. It is given a purpose, however, by grace. Out of the grace & love shown to us, we desire to love & serve others.

"Our passion for justice often seems like that [a dream]. We dream the dream of justice. We glimpse, for a moment, a world at one, a world put to rights, a world where things work out, where societies function fairly and efficiently, where we not only know what we ought to do but actually do it. And then we wake up and come back to reality. But what are we hearing when we're dreaming that dream?
It's as though we can hear, not perhaps a voice itself, but the echo of a voice: a voice speaking with calm, healing authority, speaking about justice, about things being put to rights, about peace and hope and prosperity for all. The voice continues to echo in our imagination, our subconscious...." Wright, Simply Christian.

Here's to the desire to grow up into a passion for justice.

Fall Festivities

2011-11-02T08:51:00.001-05:00

Whew! When that "fall holiday" is on a Monday, the entire weekend is party, party, party! Thanks Mrs. Nina for a great Friday morning--Charlotte looks forward to that party the most of all the class parties. I guess she gets to show her budding creative side. Thanks too, Nina, for helping us out by adding the essential scar.
Then Saturday night we had a great time at the Swearingens for the church's annual Fall Party, hosted by all the community groups. As you can see, the Games group had a great idea for Ryan & Bill. I wish I had a pic of Grant's football throw game. (The Aggies and Bears need to borrow it this week if you can get it to them.) As for Monday night--thanks to the McIlrath's for the pre-trick or treating feast. Adults and kids had a great time! Now what to do with all this candy?

As you can see we had a Harry Potter theme going for the girls. Grammie took a robe she found & turned it into a Quidditch uniform. Impressive. Ryan has read books 1-4 to the girls--they are enamored. (I am clueless.)
So glad Ryan was back for all the "fun!"

City Fun Day

2011-10-29T14:22:00.001-05:00

Thanks, Montgomery girls, for a great day in the city! It was so fun to just drive just 25 minutes & have an urban afternoon. You gave me a taste of old times in NYC, and it was great getting to know you all better.
My kids are so obviously suburban (or I am), as I screamed our way down Main Street to the park--"STOPPPP!" to my scooter crowd. They all survived, and I was left wondering how it would be to go back to four rooms & no grass. Sounds pretty sweet at times. I was reminded of the Clementes as the kids filmed a "movie" in the apartment building hallway while being warned about mean ladies who need their peace & quiet. Of course there was none to be had with this crew.

After our downtown afternoon we headed to Deep Ellum where Aunt Melanie had everything ready for turning regular blow pops into vampire pops. She is ever so creative! Then she fed us all sushi & pizza--can there be a better combo? Loved our fun day off in Dallas!

Absence Makes the Heart Grow Fonder

2011-10-29T11:14:00.001-05:00

'Tis another favorite quote of my Nana Wee. (Her name was Oleta; I got to have first shot at saying Nana Oleta and I guess it came out Nana Wee. Mom, Nancy?) I figure that she and her friends were saying this often while their husbands were off in Africa or Italy for WWII. I thought of all those military wives often these past few weeks, and how thankful I was that Ryan was just off on a mission tour, not a tour of duty.
There is something even more true about this saying when the absent one is gone for a good reason. So often when I am absent it's just for some "deserved time off." Or maybe Ryan has gone to a pastor's conference that while it is good it is also lots of fun for him. In our selfishness, isn't it hard to welcome the other home with the same enthusiasm when it's been better for one than the other? For once I had to admit that this "work" trip was probably harder for him than the solo mom bit was for me. In fact, it was easy here!! Easy to survive that is--we certainly left lots undone that would have been done, but life day to day was no struggle. There's a sense of no guilt trip, no jealousy, no bitterness (coming from me) that has accompanied his return. And that is something that makes the heart grow fonder--it's our own stuff that so often gets in the way of a great homecoming.

Pic: Loving our morning sitting at the breakfast table together. He's writing SS, I'm changing this crazy blog all over the place. Goatee or not, it's great to be across from him!

Last Trip Update

2011-10-26T22:04:00.000-05:00

This is not a blog dedicated to international suffering. However, this trip is what's going on in our lives right now, and some of you have asked for Ryan's updates to be shared. These are the last of the Ethiopia ones. I have a few India ones to add. I will backdate them, but you can find them by entering India in the search box. So fancy! For now, we're counting down: T - 18 hours.

From Ryan to THC on Sunday:
There is a large mountain that sits just on the edge of Addis Ababa. A spring at the top of the mountain gushes water that is thought to be holy.

As the AIDS crisis grew in Africa, people started migrating to the mountain, seeking healing from the holy waters of the spring. People who migrated ended up settling there. Entobo is the name of the community that sits at the base of the mountain, established by people infected with HIV.

Beza Outreach is situated in Entobo, and ministers to women with HIV/AIDS and their children. They provide medicine and health clinics for the women, and tutoring programs for the children. Beza Outreach also houses food and clothing banks.

The ministry hopes to teach women how to provide for themselves – how to get beyond living in poverty. Toward that end, they have established a jewelry shop where women how to engage their own handicraft. When they began, the women knew nothing about making jewelry. Now they are designing their own products, and it is being carried in the West by stores like Ten Thousand Villages.

If a parent becomes too sick to care for a child, or if a child becomes orphaned, Beze Outreach tries to place the child in a local home.

Beza Outreach is the project of Beza International Church, where I worshipped this morning. Beza Church runs an English service. It was a joy to worship with Christians from all over the world. They are committed to preaching the gospel both in word and deed in Addis. They are serving their community in such a way that the community is beginning to take note.

As you are waking up Sunday morning, I am praying that you have a fantastic worship service and that Jonathan won’t choke. I miss you all.

Picture 1: Children playing at Beza Outreach

Picture 2: Me receiving a tour of the shop where they show the jewelry made by the women in the outreach

Picture 3: Children waiting for a van to take them home at Beza

Picture 4: A child at Beza

Picture 5 and 6: Women collect dead branches from the mountain, bundle them, and

carry the bundles down to sell as firewood. They make about a dollar a day.

Last Update:

With over four million orphans, you can imagine that caring for children in Ethiopia is no small task. Yesterday I visited three ministries that focus on children.
My first stop was Elolam Orphanage. A woman name Harrar runs the orphanage. The orphanage was clean and well maintained and housed about fifty children. The remarkable thing about the orphanage, which looked like it had been established for 25 years, was how long it had actually existed. Harrar, who had a deep concern to care for the orphans of Addis, took in two children on her own three years ago. Since that time, Elolam has grown to care for over fifty children.
My next stop was Embracing Hope Ethiopia. Many mothers in Ethiopia are single and are unable to work because they must care for their children. Embracing Hope offers free daycare to mothers in Korah, one of the poorest neighborhoods of Addis. One of the workers told the story of a woman who survived by begging on the streets (remember, this is the community in which hundreds survive by scavenging the city dump). She was able to take a job once Embracing Hope cared for her child during the day. Embracing Hope also cares for about fifty children, but they also said that they have to turn away at least ten women a day who request their services. According to Embracing Hope, with resources they could easily double the number of children they care for.
My last stop was to A Hope Ethiopia, an orphanage that only takes in children who are HIVpositive. This was an amazing place. Even as late as 2005, the director of the program said that it was a very hard place to work because every child that came in was going to die. He said the staff was often depressed and struggled to find hope. During the Bush administration, drugs for HIV and AIDS were made available to places like Ethiopia for free. Now, as long as the children take their medicine as prescribed, they have a normal life expectancy. Now, almost 100% of their children are adopted – most by families in the United States. A Hope Ethiopia also does community education and drug administration for families in the surrounding communities struggling with HIV.
Today is my last day in Ethiopia. I am visiting a Mission to the World (our denominational mission agency) project that focuses on public health and medical assistance to families with HIV/AIDS. If you are curious to see more of this project, their website is mtwact.org.
It’s been a very moving and challenging journey. I look forward to coming home and sharing with you all. I’m sorry there are no pictures – my camera has died.

Glimpses of Ethiopia

2011-10-24T23:00:00.000-05:00

This is Ryan's first Ethiopia update. While I am going about my days as usual, I can't shake what I've heard from the team & seen in pictures they've sent. Intentional spending, intentional saving, intentional giving--a few phrases of my own kicking around in my head.

Here's from Ryan:

I’ve been in Addis Ababa, Ethiopia for two days now. The most hospitable welcome awaited me from Dave’s staff.

As it was a privilege to see what the Pieratts are doing through CRI, it is also a privilege to see what Dave is doing through his Guest Homes and Mission Ethiopia. We are richly blessed to have two intimate connections within our own church that help us to connect with the poorest of the poor.

My first stop was Korah, a community of about 130,000 people. Korah’s history goes back to the founding of a leprosy hospital about 75 years ago. The hospital is no longer there, but the descendants of the lepers are. At some point, the city also located a large dump here. Now, the descendants of lepers and street children dwell in Korah, living in part off the refuse of the dump.

Enter Pastor Antehneh, and Great Hope Ministry. This man has a fire in his belly! Great Hope Ministry is a church that offers tutoring, houses about 75 kids in a boarding school, provides food and clothing, and was currently hosting a medical team from abroad while I was there. HIV and AIDS are rampant in this community, spread from prostitutes to wives by promiscuous husbands.

We visited the women, many of whom suffer from HIV, who make bead necklaces and jewelry for Mission Ethiopia. Through their simple handicraft, they are able to help support their whole family.

With Pastor Antehneh, we visited a home where a woman was dying of AIDS. She had received the virus from her husband, who left when he learned she was sick. The medical team had been visiting her, but she was obviously in pain. I wondered if dying was a relief to living in her condition. We prayed for her, and Pastor Antehneh comforted her that soon she would be with Jesus.

In these situations the women, often abandoned, are unable to provide for themselves. Pastor Antehneh said that if a woman could not pay her rent, the owner would throw her out in the street even if she were dying. Apparently, dying in the streets is not terribly uncommon in Korah.

The next stop was to visit with Pastor Asrat at Green Light International Church. Here’s one thing that pastors in India and Ethiopia have in common: they became Christians and entered ministry as a result of miraculous experiences. The spirit of Pastor Asrat’s uncle visited him one night (not a good thing in Ethiopia – your relatives come to haunt you, I think). Pastor Asrat asked the spirit to leave, but he refused and said that he would afflict Asrat. Asrat became very sick, and after a number of attempts at treatment, the doctors pronounced Asrat would die within a matter of days. They thought he had Yellow Fever or a blood infection. The night after the pronouncement, Asrat was visited by three tall men dressed in white. He pleaded with them to make the spirit go, but they made no expression and didn’t say anything. Finally, after Asrat’s third plea, one of the men said, “If you will serve me with everything you have, then I will drive out the spirit.” Asrat complied, and the spirit was chased out by the three men in white. The next day, Asrat awoke healed.

Pastor Asrat works in a very poor area called Bole Bulbula. He focuses on pre-K kids, making sure they have clothes, enough to eat, and are ready to enter school. He also has a group of women in the community doing handicraft for Mission Ethiopia.

Pastor Asrat has sold his land, his house, and his car to engage in this ministry and keep it going. His community is so poor that on a given Sunday the offering can be as low as 10 to 20 birr ($.50 – $1.00).

Also in Bole Bulbula I visited with Pastor Abdissa. Pastor Abdissa shepherds Misgana (Praise) Evangelical Church. He, too, pays for his own ministry as a tent maker. He serves an impoverished area. One of the particular challenges to this community is that water is not very accessible. Women travel with donkeys a couple kilometers to draw water. The city will not run water to the community, and the hilly, rocky terrain makes drilling a well very expensive.

Lastly, I visited Onesimus Childhood Development Association (OCDA), led by Nega Meaza. When I arrived, children with beautiful smiles greeted me. When I learned from where they had come, I was amazed. OCDA targets street children. As of 2005, there were over 4 million orphans in Addis. Over 1.5 million were orphans as a result of AIDS. This produced a population of somewhere between 60,000 and 100,000 street kids.

OCDA runs a program that seeks to take children off the street and ultimately return them to their families or prepare them to enter society with a skill. I asked, “Why would a child want to return to their families if they ran away in the first place?” Nega told me that many children are stolen, either as cheap labor or for more illicit purposes. He said that every one of the girls in his program had been raped on the streets.

Frankly, I feel as though I’m about at my capacity for human suffering. One of the reasons I offer these updates is so that you might encounter just a bit of what we are experiencing first hand. As we gather to worship with doughnuts and coffee, much of the world gathers on a dirt floor under a leaky roof without chairs. As we debate which book to read next, much of the world debates how to find the next meal. As we pray for a good vacation or a better job, much of the world prays to be healed from a condition for which they will receive no medical care.

It’s not wrong to have resources, but it’s wrong to love them, or the comfort they provide, too much. Our brothers and sisters are suffering, and I hope that Trinity Harbor will grow into a model of love for the least of these.

20 Years!

2011-10-23T23:33:00.001-05:00

Driving towards the View I wondered about my decision to head to my 20th high school reunion. Thanks to Jenny P. there was no turning back. In retrospect, it was such a great time filled with great conversations & fun memories. My favorite part: when you're catching up with people you knew 20 years ago there is no room for talking about your kid's allergy problem or what paint color you're choosing next. It's all about who you are, why you are where you are, and what you're doing. I was impressed, inspired & humbled by every interaction I had with my old friends. I kept asking Jenny, "how do I know this person so well?" I just felt like it was a jump back (or forward) to meaningful conversations left undone. I am reminded that 12 years of school together leaves a lot of room for really knowing people, and while long ago, those weren't inconsequential years. They were formative. It was great fun seeing all of you & I hope it happens again one day soon!

The Rock Quarry

2011-10-21T08:57:00.002-05:00

I am posting a few of Ryan's updates from India here. These have moved us back here to think more carefully about our wants and needs & where real hope comes from. But how quickly we forget!!

From Ryan a few days ago:

We began the day visiting people (mostly women) who break rock at a quarry. Here’s the deal, though: The workers buy the rock from the quarry. Initially, however, the workers don’t have the money. So the rock quarry “lends” them the rock at interest. When the worker is finished breaking the rock, the worker has to sell it back to the quarry. But, by the time they sell it back to the quarry, enough debt has accumulated that it begins a vicious cycle the worker is never able to escape. Of course, you also have to buy your hammer from the quarry.

CRI, with the G Brothers, have financed 90 micro-loans to help workers cancel their debt and work only for profit. As you can imagine, the quarry owners are not pleased with this situation. Please pray that this cycle of injustice will be broken through the work of CRI and the G Brothers.

Seeing middle-aged women do back-breaking labor in the hot sun, I thought I would relieve one of them for a short time. I began hammering rock. She laughed. After five minutes, she took the hammer from me and proceeded to break the rock twice as fast as I was. Note to self: don’t mess with Indian women who work in rock quarries.

After visiting the rock quarry, we did some shopping – mostly for school supplies and various other supplies for the Raja’s Children’s Home. Nathan's workplace had raised fund for this--very cool.

This is my favorite.

At the end of the day we gathered with the church that serves the rock quarry community. We worshipped with them, and Pastor Bill did an excellent job of bringing God’s Word to them, which was translated by one of the G Brothers.

It has been a profoundly rich experience here. We are sad to leave. Please pray for the safety of those returning, and for me as I excitedly make my way to Ethiopia.

Heartbreaking, overwhelming. Thanks for the great photos, Nathan.

Thinking Outside my Walls

2011-10-19T22:29:00.001-05:00

My good friend and carpool buddy, Jennifer, reminded me today what it means to think outside of yourself when doing our daily activities. With no room for argument, she informed me as she dropped off the girls that she was making us a chicken pot pie for dinner tonight. And let me mention that her chicken pot pie has not one pre-packaged item included (as you can see). But that is really beside the point. The point is that Jenn remembers when someone is "single momming" it, and she made a point to help. And it's such a timely gift. As you probably know from experience, while I am having no trouble feeding the kids, getting them everywhere, and even getting all the good stuff done in between, I just don't feel like going above & beyond with the cooking situation. And honestly, as I consider the India trip, I feel like whatever we have to eat is just more than we need. But we live here, and we love our good food. Jenn was a blessing. I am reminded that in my daily activities to come I might look outside our own walls to those who could use a little loving.

Caveat: Several of you have asked to help out, and we are doing great. This was just a story I could wrap my little mind around and use to move me outside myself. Thanks friends!

More from India

2011-10-18T21:43:00.000-05:00

From Ryan:

Our group piled into a van this morning a drove into the Deep Forest. The Deep Forest is a region that is similar to a North American Indian reservation – it is land that has been set aside for tribal peoples. Additionally, it has become a place where untouchables have gone to live. The caste system is officially illegal in India, but it still influences culture significantly.

The drive was beautiful. We passed through rice paddies, palm tree plantations, and saw many monkeys. The drive was also characterized by a lot of stop and go because we were constantly competing with herds of cattle, goats, and monkeys on the road (there are no lanes here and you pass at will).

We went to the Deep Forest to visit churches that have been planted there with the help of the G Brothers and CRI. They also work to build church buildings, put in wells for clean drinking water, and distribute food.

Some churches had a small concrete building with a metal roof, others worshipped in a hut made of sticks and bamboo with a roof made from woven palm branches. Many people in the Deep Forest live in these kinds of huts.

The churches graciously welcomed us. The people sang songs, hung garlands around our necks, and asked us to pray for them. It was humbling. I would have liked for some of them to pray for us.

In some of the churches we were confronted with the plight of poverty: a woman whose back was permanently bent – probably from working in a rice paddy all her life, a man with feet severely swollen and arthritic legs – you could tell it hurt to take a step, and a woman with cancer in her throat – her body emaciated from the cancer’s toll. It’s in these encounters that the situation seems hopeless.

Yet, in that hopelessness the church plants are bright points of hope. They have entered a world inhabited by the forgotten and unloved, and there they proclaim the gospel through word and deed.

One last tidbit of shocking nature. We visited six congregations today. All of them were attended almost exclusively by women. Alcoholism and unemployment are rampant among the male population of the Deep Forest, and the heart of the church is women. Similar to so many times in church history, the unsung faithfulness of women is what is sustaining the church in the Deep Forest.

Lastly, the Deacons approved a $500 gift from the Benevolence Fund to buy rice for families in the Deep Forest. It was a joy to deliver that rice today. You have provided enough rice to feed fifty families for two weeks.

Today was our day to see a tiger if we were going to see one. I’m a little disappointed to report there were no such sightings.

Grace and peace,

Ryan

Jim was asked to bless the new well.

India Update

2011-10-18T00:30:00.000-05:00

From Ryan to THC:

We just completed our Monday.

After scrambling through a couple flights this morning we arrived in Rajamundry. This is the launching pad for seeing several ministry sights. We were greeted at the airport by the G Brothers – two brothers who engage ministry here together. The older, Pastor Isaiah, focuses on planting churches in the forest region near to Rajamundry. Anunth focuses on running a children’s home, which is essentially an orphanage called Raja’s (King’s) Children’s Home.

The children from the home greeted us at the airport today. They are well cared for in the home. They put on a small performance for us tonight, and they were delighted to receive a bag of colored pencils that Melody had brought each child. They were ridiculously happy, and they apparently spend much of their day studying. If they fail their entrance exams after tenth grade, then they might have to return home. Apparently that is the least desired outcome. All of the adults enjoyed interacting with the children, and our thumbs are worn out from thumb wrestling – a competition of choice here. They were eager to have their pictures taken, “You, me, one picture,” was heard over and over again.

We also stopped a saw a couple interesting sights. One was a Hindu burial facility, which was a crematorium. You bring your dead person, put them on a funeral pyre, and burn their body. Afterward, you collect the ashes and dump them in the river (the river is sacred). The oddest part about it was that the facility was built by the Rotary Club International. A live burning was going on while we were present.

There is an enormous river here (think Mississippi), and it is the heart of the city. We saw more temples today than I can count, and some different religious groups that looked pretty serious (some swamis and some groups chanting).

Tomorrow we head to the forest where millions of untouchables have ended up. Jason described it like a reservation. That’s where the church planting is going on, and we’ll see some of the churches that CRI has helped to build.

Thanks for your prayers. We’ll try to keep you posted.

We are Rich

2011-10-18T00:00:00.000-05:00

This is not a common phrase out of my mouth. As a pretty middle class family here in the US it certainly doesn’t apparently seem true, and more than that it is such an inappropriate thing to say. I mean, I remember in middle school wanting to “be like the rich girls” with their Guess jeans, unlimited faddy stuff, and fancy cars. And, for the most part, I was. But that was middle school. Surely we don’t all want to be rich now (or we would never say so). In fact, I explain away every purchase nowadays as a “bargain” or “a great deal.” Why do we do that? Do we have some sense that pursuing riches (or stuff) isn’t the best for us? Or maybe it’s me justifying every purchase I make (it was on sale!). Either way, as a content, well fed adult I would never deign to think of myself or promote myself as rich. But yet....we are.

As was pointed out to our little congregation last Sunday--if you have not had a child die of malnutrition or if you don’t wonder daily where your next bit of clean water is coming from--you are rich. I guess it could also be said--if you write a blog (even a sporadic one) you are rich. But that goes without saying.

As many of you know, Ryan is in India this week with a team from Children’s Relief International. We haven’t had much contact, but just the little updates that he’s given have served to put all things into perspective. That is the understatement of the year. How to phrase it all....The environments that the team is visiting are so incredibly far removed from my situation that I don’t know how to make sense of it. The ministry in India supports the locals there doing great works--a children’s program in an indescribable slum, a red light district children’s program (think Born into Brothels), and today they were in the great forest filled with millions of “untouchables” from the old caste system. This is like nothing we know.

So, we don’t go around feeling guilty all the time for all the food we have, but at the same time we grow in our awareness of the real, human, dignified people who live on basically nothing every day. And that awareness ultimately turns to action, but for now it is a muffled refrain that keeps playing itself over in the back of my mind. A refrain that’s helpful when I want to complain about....well, pretty much anything.

Here’s an excerpt from my google chat with Ryan last night:

8:12 PM How is the attitude of the team? Is it just despair & hopelessness or is there an excitement in the message being proclaimed amidst the poverty?

8:15 PM Ryan: It’s both. If you dwell on the size of the problem, the overwhelming poverty and spiritual darkness, then it feels hopeless. But then you see these simple, humble people doing what they can. They’re goal isn’t to end poverty in India, it’s to change the lives of a few. When you look at their faithfulness and see thirty kids who went from being street kids to well-cared for children, it is very exciting and grants a great deal of hope. These ministry sights are tiny pin pricks of light in a very dark place.

Here’s to more light.

Death in Real Life

2011-09-15T14:10:00.000-05:00

Today was a day of mourning in Rockwall. Many gathered at the service for our dear friend Linda Price-Applewick. She was a friend to all, a wife of invaluable worth & a mother beyond comparison.

The overarching theme to these two brief months of suffering & dying lead us all to the same place--why? They led Linda to this place on her visit to M.D. Anderson. “Why does this place exist,” she wrote. “Why the cancer?”

I have been down the same path today.

A swimmer on Linda’s swim team asked his mom, “Should we be happy that Linda is with Jesus now in Heaven? Should we be glad and not sad?” His mom wisely answered, “Would you be happy if it was your mommy (me) gone now?” He crumpled.

When we try to put this happiness on death, we inevitably come up short. Young swimmer is wise, as he could not honestly say that this is a happy occasion. Neither should we. This is not just another day in the life of the Universe’s time ticker. This is death; the ultimate robber. As our friend Greg H. wrote, weeks before his own death, “‘The horizon of human consciousness is an openness to an indefinite future. We aim naturally into the future. We have projects, plans, expectations, ambitions, ideas, grand desire, imagination about the future. Every death is an abrupt conclusion to the story whose potential was not necessarily limited except by accidental physical limitations we find that come up against us.’ (Hart) Death, then, is a great enemy of all that there is to being human.”

We feel this, we wrestle with this emotionally, but do we have the understanding of why this is the case? Why is the death of a wonderful person such a tragedy? AND IT IS! Linda is gone, and she should not be! Greg is gone, and he should not be!

How can we say this? Why should they not be gone? I have, today, understood more of the curse of sin than I have before. Sure...I’ve always “known” that the wages of sin is death... No, wait. Death is seriously the wages of sin. Of our forefather’s sin? Of my sin? Of your sin? We didn’t have to die? When the normal clock ticks, and a grandparent dies at an old age, I understand that this is just the way of the world--we live & we die. We’ll see you again one day we say. But when death is the robber of a young life I am graced with a deeper understanding--of the curse of sin that God doled out when His first people chose their own way apart from Him. That is harsh; that is unbearable. (I don’t understand God’s holiness or his decrees well enough!) We were condemned, banished, put out. Death entered the world--”From dust you came, to dust you shall return.”

But almost as soon as He condemns He gives hope that one day One will come and crush the head of death. God stayed with His people; He held out a promise. And then, in time, when God Himself in Jesus entered into the same situation--a life lived here, staring death in the eyes, death at an early age on our behalf--there is hope. The reality of Jesus’ young life, death, and primarily HIs defeat of death in the resurrection has more hope than I have realized up until this point. Can it be that I, Linda, Greg, you should gain from His facing death in the eyes and taking it, defeating it?

A Must Read Article

2011-06-30T14:09:00.000-05:00

On first read my thoughts were all about “those parents.” On second read I looked harder at how steeped in this culture that I am, & how I don’t even realize the ways in which I shelter the kids from truth or failure or reality. Honestly, it’s easier now to shelter than to explain the hard stuff and to give them the loving truth. Why is that easier? When we present failure or death or pain to our kids, we feel the need to make sense of it. And there’s nothing like the barrage of questions from the barstools to show you what you do or don’t really know (believe).

So why bother? This article makes the case that by over-encouraging our kids we give them a false sense of “awesomeness.” It doesn’t take long once out of the home to look around and wonder, “if I’m so above average, great at everything, & generally awesome, why am I landing boring, regular-person jobs....why am I not overly happy all the time...why does my first boss not think I’m the best thing that ever happened to his Fortune 500 company--I thought I was better than everyone else at every thing?”

Take 10-15 minutes & read this fun piece from the Atlantic Monthly. Thoughts?

How to Land Your Kids in Therapy by Lori Gottlieb

The Others on the Street

2011-06-28T14:08:00.000-05:00

Funny how the story of the king’s wedding feast never occurred to me until Mom mentioned it--of course when you’re talking about Andrea’s cooking, the analogy fits all the more so. Last Friday the exciting news of an open invitation to dinner popped up on our church’s “online community.” After having several families decline a verbal dinner invitation, the Piccolo family bravely issued a call to dinner, bringing twenty-eight of us running. The news that Andrea was testing an America’s Test Kitchen dessert was all the more intriguing, as if the company alone wouldn’t have been enough.

Besides being admirably brave (how many 3-5 year olds were there?!) this type of open invitation stood out to me as an example of true hospitality within a community--I so like to have control over my plans, think about how things will play out, and try to make arrangements. Or I want my hospitality to be self-serving in that I have as much fun as those I am hosting. That’s probably something different all together, like party planning. Issuing a last minute call leaves a lot up to “chance.” But that’s where life often gets more interesting and where hospitality actually becomes true hospitality.

Seriously!

2011-06-19T14:07:00.000-05:00

So as soon as I go and think hard about beauty, discuss it with some friends, and then write a blog post on it & its subjectivity what should happen!? I get a haircut. From hell.

Prior to yesterday, the last time I cried over a haircut was in 2003, just before I gave birth to Molly. I was huge & remember saying how many pictures would be taken around the birth & how I always notice my mom’s hair in my newborn pictures (perfect 70s bouffant). Of course we all survived that, and this time around there need be no pics except the one above that I willingly put on display (with hat of course). Let’s just get it over with!

This is definitely a White Whine post! Just some everyday fun to go with the Jack Handy stuff. I thought you’d enjoy the irony.

Pretty Is As Pretty Does

2011-06-14T14:03:00.000-05:00

This was a favorite saying of my Nana Wee’s, and I found myself using it recently talking to my girls. Pretty Is As Pretty Does. Sounds good, and I do believe it, but I still find myself telling the girls how pretty they look in this dress or in that outfit.

Pretty Is As Pretty Does lies behind my best definition of beauty, if not always my functioning one. How are things that we “do” beautiful? I think of the S story, mentioned in the post before. The S family took in three pre-teens, loved them as parents for a whole year, & sacrificed great time, energy & resources to make these kids’ lives more whole. This is beautiful. The Dave M. Story (see video posted under ‘Pretty Things’) is a video of beauty--lives made more whole by being given a family or a job or a bed to sleep in.

But the more I thought about this, I wondered why we use the word Beauty here for such stories. Justice comes to mind more readily; or charity or love. But in my circles, Beauty seems to be a common word used to describe such acts or stories.

And yet we use Beauty in such another way as well--a beautiful body, painting, song, or home. As I’ve thought about this more common use of the word beauty & wrestled with its meaning, I’ve been surprised at the subjectivity of it. How can we put a definition on what is truly beautiful?

Case in point: Earlier this year I attended a talk at PCPC, a big ole church in Dallas. The talk was good, but the highlight was an impromptu song at the end of the talk--played on the new, multi-million dollar pipe organ. Tears were in my eyes as the artistry of the organist, the majesty of the instrument, and the singing of thousands filled the room. The service ended, and I praised the song immediately to my friend D. His response--”I hate pipe organs!” What? Who hates pipe organs! Who even has enough exposure to pipe organs to then hate them? But there it was--beauty subjective.

And from there, the easiest of examples, beauty runs down an interpreters road. Beauty is a tight forehead & upturned eyes--or beauty is a naturally aged face. Beauty is a thin rail of a woman with a concave chest--or beauty is a rounded, shapely figure. Beauty is a man’s hot back (I had a friend who was way into backs)--or beauty is a skinny, intellectual looking guy. And on & on & on....

So, I’m still thinking about beauty, what makes a story beautiful, and how we can decide what is truly beautiful. And why does any of this matter?

Learning the Longing for Justice

2011-06-07T14:03:00.000-05:00

Books I have been reading lately often speak about how we all have this sense that things are not right & that we all have a longing to see the world put to rights. We see injustice & we are outraged; we hear of those who have no voice & we are appalled.

As for me, as I read words like this, I tend to picture the distant atrocities. I think of the Sudan and wonder how we can help. I think of the refugee crisis in so many middle eastern countries. I think of the orphan far, far away.

However, the past weeks in particular have brought the picture of injustice much closer to home. As many of you know, the amazing S family has hosted three foster kids for the past year. I cannot imagine the work involved in a commitment like this, and they have poured themselves into these kids. These kids’ lives have been transformed during their stay with the S fam--the first night they were there Patti & Gary sat them down for evening devotionals & told them the story of a God who loved them. These kids heard the name of Jesus for the first time ever that night. After just a few days, maybe even that first night, a huge look of relief started to come over the kids as they heard about such love & particularly about the forgiveness offered. They quickly became a part of the family, though there were daily surprises on every front. They were given clear boundaries while at the S home--structure, rules, limits, chores--and they were given such grace & privileges--soccer, football, piano, (& structure, rules, limits, chores). These kids thrived.

It is with a great shout of anger at the injustice in this world that we say goodbye to these kids. The time would eventually come when they would have to move on, but it came soon. The need for respite care foster parents is so great that there is no one who can take these kids while Patti cares for her very sick daughter. They will go back into the system for an indefinite amount of time.

Even through this, Patti has spoken words of wisdom & faith to me. She is ever-teaching. I am feeling pretty hopeless in all of this--and there is great, great reason to mourn here. The system is not pretty, these lives didn’t just end up here casually, and there is much heartache. But there is a faithful God & they are his children. He will not forget them nor will He forget His promises to them.

I am also left to wonder, through tears, what God is teaching our little community. There is certainly a refrain through this that a team effort is needed. What does that look like, I don’t know. But injustice is so ugly that I want to find out, kind of.

Rituals of Summer

2011-06-04T14:03:00.000-05:00

The TX Tompkins crew is now one week into summer break and we have survived, possibly thrived. I must say this is the first year I headed into the break with fear & trepidation. The weekends of May had been battle zones around here, and I could only anticipate that every day this summer might play out the same.

So far, the first week has been people, people, people which seems to help us all out. If I remember to use it intentionally, summer can be such a good time to catch up with friends whose schedules don’t cross ours during the school year. The ‘burbs are so different than small town life (or big city neighborhood life) in the sense that while we (and our kids) may have friends from church, friends from a mom’s playgroup, sweet family, & friends from school, none of those circles overlap. Part of my transition into this lifestyle is working to make those overlap for everyone’s benefit. Our relationships become so spread out that we don’t get to know a few people really well--at least that can be the case for me. So, as we look at our summer, I hope to use it as the great relationship building time it can be.

Growing Up into Hospitality

2011-05-24T13:58:00.000-05:00

Looking back on this year & ahead to just next week, I am struck by the call for group eating. Sharing a meal together--nothing beats it! Cooking the meal--well, I love that part as well (usually). No, seriously, I do love it; but everything in life (it seems) takes me about two years to accept. Just cooking for five people on a regular basis--I’m finally there. Now to become a Tracy L. when it comes to “no problem” coffee cake for 80! I remember receiving a “covered dish” at one of my bridal showers. You know, a pyrex 9x13 with a plastic lid. Given that I was living in NYC at the time with no car, no kids, and no potluck meals I returned it. (Sorry whoever had the foresight to buy that for me!) Now, just a few (or many) years later I could use about four of those dishes--thanks Mel for the Mom’s Day starter one!!

So there’s hospitality outside the home (taking food here & there) & there’s the obvious hospitality in the home. We had the great fortune of living just blocks from several friends in New York who showed us by example the benefits of hospitality. Around the same time I read Mudhouse Sabbath by Lauren Winner. Her chapter on hospitality was great. “Christians & Jews hold in common one theological basis for hospitality: Creation. Creation is the ultimate expression of God’s hospitality to His creatures. In the words of one rabbi, everything God created is a ‘manifestation of His kindness. The world is one big hospitality inn.’ To invite people into our homes is to respond with gratitude to the God who made a home for us.”

You know, even if it’s just for coffee or tea, the people who have made space for me in their homes have given such a gift. It is in these small acts that we extend ourselves to others. Winner goes on to talk about the obstacles to hospitality--perfection, space, honesty & she ends with this, “So you see that asking people into my life is not so different from asking them into my apartment. Like my apartment, my interior life is never going to be wholly respectable, cleaned up, and gleaming. But that is where I live. In the certitude of God, I ought to be able to risk issuing the occasional invitation.” I think over the years I paraphrased this to something like, “my house doesn’t have to be perfect to have people over--my life’s not.”

If anyone has quotes, philosophies, frustrations with, or examples of hospitality please share!!

Blogging in TX Again

2011-05-23T12:59:00.000-05:00

So, I’ve been thinking about blogging again for a while. Every time I think I have time to throw a few updates on here I tell myself that I have nothing to say. Which is very close to true. But what I am finding lately is that so many other people have incredible things to say. Maybe, just maybe, I can make this place a little gathering spot for some of those great stories (with my day to day happenings mixed in).

You know, I’m a pastor’s wife. I don’t usually mention that, but one thing I’ve come to realize this past year is how that impacts my friendships--the people who are in my life. I am not talking about the lack of party hardy invitations we get (which is true--pastors can be a buzz kill evidently), but I am referring to who my friends actually are. While evaluating who my TX friends are, one thing came to me--I have friends that I have gone out and made & they are such a fun crowd. You know who you are--and you are the loudest, most fun crew I could hope to meet here! But on the other hand, the primary way that I make friends is whoever God brings to our little church. What a privilege--we all have it if we want it--to live week by week not yet even knowing who the next amazing person with the next extraordinary story is that I will meet. I am grateful!

Gotcha!

2010-06-26T14:14:00.003-05:00

We are so thankful that we “gotcha,” the best little pumpkin head baby in the world, two years ago today. If we say it once, we say it everyday: we cannot believe the gift of Lewis & how he is such a perfect fit for our family. He IS our family so clearly & two years down the road he is just a constant blessing. He cracks us up at every dinner, he is so super smart, & he just loves his grandparents & sisters & friends. We love you, Buddy!

Happy Mother's Day

2010-05-10T15:04:00.004-05:00

Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body. ~Elizabeth Stone

Don't worry that children never listen to you; worry that they are always watching you. ~Robert Fulghum

Parents often talk about the younger generation as if they didn't have anything to do with it. ~Haim Ginott

Being a mother is never going to the bathroom alone. ~Pat Ross

These are a few quotes I came across as I was looking for ways to honor our wonderful moms. We love you & owe you our honor & thanks!

Camping 101

2010-05-04T17:53:00.000-05:00

Fate it Is

2010-04-13T21:02:00.008-05:00

So, I finally got those packages mailed. Went to the Fate Post Office, my office of choice. There's usually one postal woman working, & she has things under control! She's from Long Island, so that probably helps, but she's got the friendly thing down really well too. It was like old home week in there yesterday. People borrowing her tape, getting advice, making tax jokes; yes, Fate it is. Never mind the hours (they close for lunch 12-1 & then again at 4 for the day), Fate it is. I did all my adoption mailing from Fate, and I swore that had I still been in NYC Lewis would not be with us. I'll take cities any day for most of life; give me a town of 1000 for my mail.

On a different note, we're all enraptured here with the story the Scheeles are living out & detailing on their blog. These dear Rockwall friends are in China picking up little Lydia (Zhen Zhen) who is 6 years old! She is having a hard time emotionally (of course!), but she sure does look like she's having the time of her life. Molly was asking about what Lydia could do, being that she's so small. When I told her of Lydia's coloring expertise detailed by Detra we just had to head to Target and pick out some welcome home coloring books for Lydia (along with ten other things for us being that it was Target). Very exciting & fun to see the girls praying for & anticipating the arrival of their new friend. If you want to follow them, their blog is HERE. Their story is fate of the best sort; fate that trusts the master Planner who rescues & loves.

Reflections at the Post Office

2010-04-10T13:15:00.005-05:00

So I have had these boxes in my car to mail for about two weeks. I finally made it to the Rockwall Post Office on Thursday. I make a huge scene of entering because of the size & number of my boxes. A man stepped out of line to open the door for me just as I got it open myself. I was third in line. The postmaster loudly asks me, when she sees the size of my boxes, "Those ready to go?" I am unsure how to answer. If they were ready to go I wouldn't be in line, right? She just meant, "They need postage?" Yes, yes I answer. Thanks, though. (She would have just taken them from me if they had had postage.)

So, the couple she is helping at the time is trying to overnight an envelope. She gets it all ready to mail, only then to helpfully advise them at the last minute that they could actually transfer their documents to a flat rate envelope in order to save some money. They proceed to do this. I am thinking to myself how this is a different post office experience than my NYC days. Though those days are getting further & further away, the post-traumatic stress of the city post offices has not diminished. I am appreciative of this kind postmaster. She is taking her time, helping the uninformed couple. Of course, all this takes time; efficiency is not always king here in Rockwall! It's 11 by this time, and I had organized a meet up at exactly 11 up the street at TX Roast. I hated to make another scene, but I did just that. Not huffing, not steaming I took my large boxes back out of the double doors & back to my car where they still sit, probably for another two weeks. I go back & forth some days, but this day kindness trumped efficiency. Maybe I am a true Texan after all.

3-2=1 and 2-1=less than 1

2010-02-28T23:24:00.005-06:00

Three kids take away two kids and you have...easy living. Thanks to Mom & Dad for having M&C in Waco these three days. It's like vacation in your own home, which I might trumpet as my new favorite vacation spot yet. Ok, Europe or the Rockies may be calling, but none-the-less, home sweet home is nice & quiet. I'll take it.

On a sober note, Ryan's grandmother passed away yesterday afternoon. He flies to NY later this week to celebrate a life long-lived with a love long-held. The sweet suffering of a life partner without his other self is indeed bitter. Our prayers & love are sent through Ryan to Tommy Tompkins, father to five amazing boys & five amazing families.

Home Sweet Home

2010-02-23T20:20:00.003-06:00

That's how it felt, anyway, as I deplaned at New York's La Guardia Saturday morning. As my West African cab driver carried me along the BQE I stared out my window in a trance. The buildings, non-stop; the people, of every tribe; the traffic, crazy as usual. I cried.

What a great weekend celebrating (the main point of the trip) with Cynthia & Adam--hooray for the newly-weds! I just have to come back soon, right Cyn. Way too short with you, but that's what happens when you have a wedding party I guess! All your people in three rooms for three hours. How fun to see you & Adam enjoying your friends & loving one another!

On top of it all, I got to visit (kid-free) with old friends & amazingly hospitable family. Thank you, thank you everyone for taking time out of your weekend to sit & hang. It was restoring in more ways than you will ever know. I believe without a doubt that God answered my selfish prayer that the stomach bug would miraculously cease with Charlotte. It did. And it returned today, 12 hours after my return. That is goodness, seriously!

18 or Older

2010-02-19T19:56:00.003-06:00

So we "downsized" to the cheap (really cheap) cable plan. Therefore, our kids' stations are greatly compromised--they don't seem to mind however. So, they are getting their new fill of commercials for just about the first time ever. Tonight while I was making dinner, Molly (6) is telling me all about this stuffed animal/pillow thing that "you can take on car trips and is great for sleepovers." I say something about this being an item she might want to spend "her" money on or ask for for a special occasion. She is fine with this but then informs me that "you have to be 18 or older to order" so that Mommy will need to call in the order.

I laughed. Then I was glad for the little bit of sheltering we attempt to give them.

Chores Schmores

2010-02-07T15:14:00.005-06:00

So, I'm not sure I can jump into the Facebook world & back into blogging all at the same time. As I gaze out the glass doors of my "office" to the piles of laundry decorating my lovely dining room table, something (someone?) says "No, not a good idea!" It is helpful, though, to have an impetus driving me to get back online, though. When I can do it for more than just my random musings it's very helpful because I could certainly be stuck with the question, "what do I have to say!?" (Those of you who know me in person know that I often have quite a lot to say...but is it worth writing down?!!)

So, time will tell if Facebook & blogging pay off in any kind of substantial way, both for the maintaining of once day to day relationships (miss you all!) & also for the building of a little community in Rockwall known (or not so known) as Trinity Harbor Church. So, we'll see. I might give it a try, but then again, the laundry might beckon.

We just got home from a great morning in church, one that does actually inspire me to write. As a friend put it, the gospel was just all over, expressing itself so clearly in the story of Jonah--his God willing to love & forgive his enemies. The reminder that we were (are) enemies of God except for his great mercy in Jesus is always, always a good word.

Now, off to one of our most fun friend's home for some Super Bowl action. Go...Saints I think!!

KXT

2009-11-09T13:15:00.005-06:00

New Dallas Music Radio 91.7!

With a lineup including
World Cafe,
Acoustic Cafe,
Mountain Stage,
Texas Mix,
I am pumped.
Tune in & enjoy!

Parenting Veggie Tip

2009-09-15T18:51:00.002-05:00

So, I accidentally over salted the sauteed broccoli tonight to the extent that I was gagging. However, both Charlotte & Lewis ate every last bite on their plates. Is there any kind of max on a kid's sodium intake? If not, over salt that broccoli!

Have a Magical Day

2009-09-12T22:41:00.003-05:00

So I recovered from the Bart's visit; a few (ok, a lot of) tears shed on their departure. It was such a great, albeit it brief, time with old & best of friends. A mere six days later, I had the privilege of escorting Molly to her first of many "field trips" as a school girl. Yes, D World. The full out, week long, princesses & pluto Disney World educational vacation. Not that I was there a week...her Gigi & Grandaddy provided the ultimate 6 year old vacation of a lifetime. Will Broken Bow be able to compete?? Mom & Dad have a vision of taking each of their grandkids at around 6 years of age to Disney World for an action packed adventure. Surely they will peter out sooner than later! But for now, what a treat!!! I have never heard Molly more excited than on the phone every night telling us of her excursions, what she'd seen & done. Today was her birthday, 6 years old. Can it be!?

I am personally in my own d-world, "denial world," because (as I may have failed to mention) I am attempting to home school for kindergarten. We have made it through two weeks on & now two weeks off (sort-of, she's doing a few lessons on the RV ride home :)! ) So, maybe a future post will be regarding the real world of such an education experience. It is indeed an experience; my personal verdict is still out, though my philosophical verdict still stands.

Cheers & have a Magical Day. Ha!

Old Friends a Comin!

2009-08-29T21:10:00.004-05:00

(Stacy & Lewis, Nov 2008)

Maybe I will keep updating the blog. I am super excited. The Barts will be here in a mere 12 hours! Tuck performed a wedding tonight in Dallas, and he & Stacy (yes, she flew) will be at church in the AM. We get 24 sacred hours with them. We will have to make the most of it, gleaning all wisdom from our super duper special friends. They haven't seen M&C in years; they met Lewis in November. What a pronounced difference they will see; a sleepless baby at their house, so confused as to where the heck he was (Philly) & what was going on (coldness). They are just in time for our new series, Jesus in the Suburbs. The antithesis of University City, Philly that's for sure. Here's to the Barts.

Happy Weekend

2009-08-28T21:45:00.003-05:00

This is just for a couple of chuckles. This little dress up queen just cracks me up & makes me teary all at the same time. I just want to squeeze her so tightly, even when she's making me crazy.

Amazing Weekend

2009-06-29T22:28:00.008-05:00

We have had the most amazing weekend back "home" in NYC celebrating the marriage of Joel & Natasha! (Ryan's brother & my new sister.)

...OK, so I started this post weeks ago, but the memories are still fresh. Our long weekend in NYC was just amazing. A taste of the urban adventures that are fresh every day. A few pics to depict what Ryan calls The Wedding of the Decade. I cannot get them posted here, but here's a link to a few of them: Wedding.

To cap off the weekend, we were able to see a very few friends in the city. Our time was limited, but the moments spent with old friends renewed in me the desire for true community. To enter into such rich, old & transparent relationships was a pure joy. I have already seen the fruit of answered prayer to that end back here in TX. Miss it, love you all!

A Flood of Memories

2009-06-09T20:41:00.005-05:00

Hey There...So, yes, I think I've posted about 5 times since Lewis came back across the Pacific. A third can rock your world (or it did mine). Anyway, I had a couple of minutes so I thought I'd write about this week--it's the first week of swimming lessons for the girls, & we're on the same schedule as last year. Last June it was during swimming lessons that I got the email that we were heading out within days to pick up Lewis. Ryan was away at GA, and it was the three girls hanging out together. I remember the sweet feeling that I was loving having just two who could both converse & laugh with me, follow directions (sometimes), and that I had a hand for each one to hold. I knew that all that was about to change, so I savored it with the joy of knowing something even better was coming down the pike. So, as we head out each day to the lessons I am reminded of this time 1 year ago when we rushed home to order visas, make flight arrangements, and gather up a thousand baby supplies. It seems like yesterday & forever ago.

2009-02-22T21:21:00.006-06:00

So I started reading Crunchy Cons by Rod Dreher today. It was recommended to me by Gretchen, my friend from church. She said she thought it summarized well our congregation (or some of it). I am curious to read it, as I know some of you out there have already. I also know that "some of you out there" means Marian, Nancy, & E and I do thank you for your patience with me. Which brings me back around to Chapter 2 of the book on Technology. Dreher includes a great quote from Neil Postman's book Technopoly, written in 1992. He'd have a whole new world of topics if he were still alive. Anyway, to quote snippits, "We naively accept new technologies, thinking only of what these technologies can do, but never what they can undo. Consider television, and the way it conditions us to interpret reality. Now, whenever conservatives (Dreher is speaking about "typical" conservatives, not his "crunchy" brand here) get their dander up about TV, it's almost always to rant about salacious programming. Run for your lives, it's Janet Jackson's unsheathed ta-ta! Postman said this kind of thing is a pointless distraction...He invited us to think more deeply into how the medium itself changes the way we think. By its very nature, tv technology teaches us to experience the world as a series of fragmentary images. It trains us to prize emotion & stimulation over logic & abstract thought. We are conditioned to expect quick resolution to problems & to develop short attention spans....For the man who gets his metaphysics from tv, BOREDOM is the root of all evil."

Something similar to this was said in today's sermon, so probably the repeat experience hit me. I don't watch that much TV, but it did jolt me into re-examining (or more like telling myself to re-examine at a later date b/c nap time had just ended for Lewis) the way(s) in which I experience reality. I also decided that I need to either facebook OR blog. I mean, I do neither one very well but maybe if I just committed to one I would do it better & not spend too much time. Facebooking would be easier & probably more fun. Blogging is a good exercise but probably not a great use of time either. I am a selfish blogger too; I check other's blogs about once a quarter. Does anyone have a suggestion here? FB or Blog?

Since my brain runs low quite often, Crunchy Cons may pop up here & there if & when I blog. Anyone else read this book? Love it? Hate it?

On the home front, we had a fun weekend in Waco (Thurs-Sat) where my cousin Nathan was married last night. They had a super fun reception & honestly it was maybe the first time I just LOVED having my kids (M&C attended) be a part of a grown-up/family event. How totally fun to party with your 3 & 5 year old on the dance floor! Uncle Justin, Amber, Marian & John were all there which just added to the FUN while Gigi & Grandaddy were the beautiful, doting grandparents who made it all happen. Loved seeing all the Ross clan who are the best. Loved it.

Oh, and that did fall on Ryan's B-Day. The big 35. That means halfway to 70!

Math Quiz

2009-02-14T20:32:00.002-06:00

So the girls really like doing "math quiz" at random times. The story questions: if you have 5 princess dresses and I give you 3 more princess dresses, how many princess dresses do you have? So my question today is if you have 3 kids and my parents take 1 how many do you have? Yes, 2! And the "quiet" 2 is who I have had for the past two days. What an amazing difference it makes taking one person out of the mix and in turn taking four relationship out of the equation as well. Molly has had a great time with Gigi as they visited my great-aunt Martha who is 93 and lives in Oklahoma. We visited her from time to time when my parents were living in OK, but we haven't seen her in a while. I am so thankful for that time; Molly will remember her time with Aunt Martha, born 1916, forever. I still remember visiting Uncle Herman when I was about her age in rural Oklahoma. The most remarkable thing about that visit was doing all the dishes "by hand." He had no dishwasher which I thought was just amazing...until I lived in NYC and realized I might never have a dishwasher again, just like Uncle Herman. Needless to say, I have had great times with Charlotte & Lewis these past days. What a difference w/o the oldest around!!! (My mom said it was like this when I was gone. I can't imagine.) And, I've listened to NPR both days & feel like I just might know a little what is going on in the world again. Evidently we're in some sort of economic situation these days, ha ha. Not really funny, as we all know people who are being directly affected this very day. But, I would like to offer a heartfelt thanks to Gigi & Grandaddy for having Molly these three days!
To add to the change, Grammie & Papa are getting settled here in Rockwall and have taken one, two, or three kids on various occasions. This is just a whole new world & it's very good. Thanks to you all!! I am so excited about these generational relationships building (& it doesn't do me any harm either, right Baroness). As I write Jim & Deb are actually in Waco after taking in a couple of BU basketball games today. They will bring Molly back with them. Family is so great!
Happy Valentines Day to you all. My Valentine is hard at work on tomorrow's SS class; romance at its best.

Bloggerific

2009-02-06T22:21:00.002-06:00

Wow, two posts in two weeks! While you might not know it from my blog posts, I do use my computer on a regular basis. However, I managed to literally drop my laptop ten days ago and have been without the lifeline since then. Ryan, genius that he is, purchased an extended hardware warranty (guessing that the kids would break my computer) & Dell fixed my damage in a matter of days. I must admit that the 10 day break from email & web "research" was an overall good thing. I checked email for the urgent stuff at night on Ryan's Mac (my Apple Handicap prevented much work), but my daytime stuff was zero. I realized how often a quiet moment (or 30 seconds) would come during the day & I'd run to my email to see what had come in, etc. Without the web handy I just had to sit down & let the kids run around me for that down moment. It was far less of a battle than my instant gratification of emails which results in numerous pleas for attention--much more lost than gained. Now if I can discipline myself to send/receive at night only. Ha, do I fool myself that I have that much self discipline? Maybe I will try.

Other than no internet connection, not much is going on here. Lewis is doing great oveall, but his need to be picked up might drive me batty. I did resume my gym time last week; what a freedom--1 hour on my own. While he may get every cold under the sun from the childcare, we will just call it "developing an immune system." At about 6 months he did indeed develop attachment to Ryan & me, crying when we would leave him. Yes, it took that long and that was due to following the "rules" with him--being his primary caretakers all of the time. It is encouraging to see that the work pays off; he recognizes us as Mommy & Daddy, providers. (This is not to say that he doesn't prefer the attention of grandparents or aunts, but I think that is normal, right? They give such better lovin'.) He cried on the first few gym visits, but now he goes to the cute, young girls with open arms...they learn early. As a reward for my gym visits, I enjoyed three cookeis today. That is not the right balance I'm sure. Whatever, I'm entitled, right? Cheers.

January

2009-01-29T21:41:00.003-06:00

So, only a few months have passed. In the past weeks half of the Tompkins' family has relocated to the great state of TX. Yes, in January both Melanie & then Jim and Deb (Papa & Grammie) moved to TX. Tomorrow will mark the first day since January 5th that we have no visitors in our home. Most likely I will be depressed. In many ways I am sure I thrive on the chaos of having extra people in the home & the details of setting up a new life. In Mel's case this required the purchasing of a new car, insurance, couch, table, bed, mattress, etc. What fun. She may disagree. All I can say is that we are SO excited to have family in such close proximity. What a blessing, especially in the current mobile culture. The kiddos will grow up with "let's go by Grammie's" as a normal phrase. What could be more exciting!? We hope the adjustment goes well & the job search (recession no problem!) even better.

Overall, this has been a crazy 6 months. Lewis just turned 18 months; sometimes it feels like things are under control. Most of the time things seem more chaotic than I could imagine. I'd like to keep blogging; we'll see. Hang with me. Love, J

Recap

2008-12-17T23:11:00.009-06:00

We went to Oneotna. The girl had 1 inch of snow & were thrilled. Grammie & Aunt Mel threw a terrific Fancy Nancy Tea Party which was a huge success.

We returned & Melanie flew to TX the same day. She interviewed, scored with 2 offers, accepted one, and found an apartment! Go Aunt Mel! (Some of the apt hunting was with 3 kids in tow.)

We (my mom & I) hosted a little Christmas Tea for a few of M & C's girl friends. I stole this idea from Chris W. It was a blast.

Lewis' adoption was recognized by the great state of TX.

I started Christmas shopping & the rest is a blur.

Then, tonight we had a superb Christmas Dinner at Trinity Harbor. The attendance was out of this world; the basement renovations at the 100 year old church building allowed seating for all 140 who were there. Very fun & festive. Our guests from the Boles Home for Orphaned Boys were pumped about their gifts. Celebrating Light entering Darkness takes on lots of forms & fashions. December is a fun & crazy time.

Packing

2008-11-22T13:09:00.007-06:00

All is quiet, 3 people are in their rooms for nap or room time. It is the best part of the day! 1 hour to regroup, get dressed in some cases, & frantically do everything else. Thanks to E's & Mercy's kind posts, I'll try to say Hi now and then too. We are frantically running around collecting winter gear for our upcoming trip to Oneonta. Yeah!! Seeing all the Tompkins crew & flying this crew on the long jaunt to Albany; all very fun. Molly has kept herself quite busy packing all the carry-ons. She loves planning, packing, organizing & has all the Strawberry Shortcake "fruit snacks" (no food or fruit really in these), pretzels, & goldfish in baggies, equally divided of course between her & C. It is hilarious how many times per day she asks if we can pack now. Love it! I'm also wondering if it's worth a shopping trip to find some quality slippers that they will actually keep on their feet & possibly some cheap snow boots--there's a bit of potential snow in the forecast. We only turned our heat on Sunday for the first time, so I am stretching my mind to remember how cold "25 & snowing" is. I think that's officially cold. Anyway, off to take advantage of these next 50 minutes.

Oh, this random pic is one of a milk break. Do you like the bed head little guy!? We did have haircuts yesterday (all 3!) (yes, I had to hold Lewis the whole time), but I don't have any new pics yet. Later.

And this is the other night involving the Dora kite flying. Right after I took this, Lewis let go & it flew onto the neighbor's roof. It was all twisted up anyway because earlier someone (Molly) had gotten her flip flop twisted in the string. How does this stuff happen!?

Monthly Blog?

2008-11-18T21:55:00.003-06:00

So, maybe blogging with three is not going to be a regular event. No surprise to any of you still hanging in there with me. When 8 PM hits (on the nights we're home), and they go down I basically clean up the day's carnage & crash on the couch with no ounce of creativity or even dexterity to write. I know this will pass, so I post here & there. I do like the blog; we still have friends & family far away, and I love you all & want to give you snippets of the everyday. (Even friends nearby we see less regularly it seems!)
A few updates: We decided kind of last minute to travel to upstate NY for Thanksgiving. We are so excited, as all Ryan's family will be in Oneonta for the holiday, and none of them (except Deb) have met Lewis. There are, to say the least, many plans in the works for the week (Fancy Nancy Party, alliterated menu, etc.). Separately, there is a contract on Ryan's parents house, which is great news--if all goes well, they will be headed to TX soon! Not to mention Melanie, Ryan's sister, has several Dallas hospitals knocking down her door. (She just passed her PT exam & is official!! Congrats Mel!) This is all overwhelming & so exciting.
In light of our upcoming trip, we decided to decorate early for Christmas. As you know, we never do anything early, so this feels pretty crazy. Our tree is lit as I write.
Last weekend we made the last BU home game against A&M; they WON! So fun; so fun to see all the ardent supporters so happy. And great to see Molly W. & her boys. If anyone reading this (Kara) is a BU fan, this is a funny post: some A&M blog or something.
Anyway, that's about it. Lewis continues to do really, really great. He is seemingly totally comfortable during the day & NIGHT which is better than great. He loves his sisters, is saying a few words (thank you, dada, gigi, yelling for just about everything else), and is overall so happy. It is just so fun to play around with him & receive his affection--he is such a hugger & a smiler. He walks everywhere & is into everything, especially anything electronic. He & Ryan made a trip to Lowe's the other night, and he just looked around in awe, silent the whole trip. Project boy is lying in wait.
Love, J

First Election Day

2008-11-05T14:13:00.004-06:00

(For Lewis that is.) There was an extra element of pride & excitement in my voting yesterday as I had Lewis with me. Remembering Vietnam and how his people never have the chance to vote on anything made me appreciate all the more our democratic system. Where has my cynicism gone!? Between football & this I am due for a visit to the Northeast!

We had some Dr. checkups today. Lewis is still only 19 lbs! He seems so much bigger than when we met him, but only about 1.5 lbs has he gained. It's so cute, though. His legs have a little baby fat on them which is good to see. I guess he'll always be on the small side. Ah, to be Vietnamese must be nice...He also has an ear infection; who knew. And after his 4 vaccinations, he is mighty cranky. Poor guy. I'm headed to hang with him for the few quiet minutes we have around here (nap time/room time). Oh yeah, and I should think about dinner. I keep forgetting that part of the day!

It's Still There

2008-11-02T22:50:00.003-06:00

After 11 years in NYC/Philly (with no cable) I would have sworn my love for college football had been buried with really no mourning involved. However, after yesterday's Baylor/Missouri game, I am pretty sure it's not totally dead. It was SO fun to yell like crazy, along with 35,000 others, for the most underdog team in the Big 12. We totally hung in there; I have a hope for some really fun games in the future. It was Baylor homecoming weekend, and the kids had a great time at Pigskin & the parade (candy)! Maybe we'll swing one more game this year; it's great having my parents in Waco where Baylor is. It's kind of weird to go back. There were the Baylor years, which I LOVED, then the NYC years, which I also LOVED. These two places could not be more opposite. Bringing those two parts of me together is often hard. How do they make sense? Still working that out, as I know there are common threads & none of it has been a detour or a waste of time. Indeed, the journey has been great fun.

Day to Day

2008-10-24T22:05:00.007-05:00

Though you wouldn't know it from the frequency of my blog posts, I do feel like I am beginning to emerge from the "newborn cave" as Ryan likes to call it. Maybe there's another descriptor more apt to the post-adoption process or to the 3 kids thang. They both make the cave seem attractive at times. But, that is simply memory failing and covering over three-times-per-night feedings. This is different, and I am glad to be emerging. While I don't think some things will ever return (like talking on the phone during daylight hours), a few old practices from the past are surfacing. We accomplished two whole playdates this week--I love playdates & this was so encouraging! Believe it or not, I also FINISHED my book for book club on Thursday, another feat of unbelievable strength. I told the book club (most of whom I don't know well which is a good motivator) about the friendly skit at our going away party from NYC depicting Jennifer attending book club for the snacks, wine, & friends. Book negotiable. And, while these two accomplishments may not seem like much, might I mention that Lewis has spent approximately 30% of the last three night actually ASLEEP. That is a really bad number. He had a cold...I guess he is the type who believes in just staying up all night & partying away his colds. I just might have been a bit grumpy during all these milestones, but that is an aside. I have this new under-eye concealer...
So, here are a few pics from the day-to-day of our past week. The muffin tins tell the story of another great feat--chocolate chip pumpkin muffins today (one belongs to a 3 year old, one to a 5 year old--lots of difference in 2 years!). I found this recipe online; it was not the best. Can anyone direct me to the best one?
Overall, Lewis is doing great. He now walks more than he crawls & is so proud of himself. It is so cute; he gets the biggest grin when he gets from point A to B. It's very encouraging to see him look to me or to Ryan for that applause. He relishes in it. We are so blessed by him!!
And, finally, it finally turned Fall around here. We are loving the 70 degree days & colder nights. It's true; it always turns around Halloween.
Happy Fall!

Idaho!

2008-10-17T21:42:00.008-05:00

Sun Valley, Idaho. Who Knew!!

What a great weekend we had with Justin & Amber. Though the first few days reached a high of 32 degrees, we managed three amazing hikes. (The first had some serious snow falling on us and Lewis was NOT happy. His second hike was perfect with pics above. He recovered & is a natural outdoors man for sure.) Thanks, guys, for hosting the three of us for a relaxing, mountain-filled five days. Can I mention how we ate at The Kneadery for three breakfasts in a row? The best brunch since Kitchenette!! If there's one thing we like as well as a good hike, it's a good brunch. Sun Valley is the perfect town--while only boasting 3000 residents, it must have more good restaurants, book stores, & coffee shops per capita than anywhere. I think we hit them all.

Our Mediterranean Prince

2008-10-06T00:33:00.009-05:00

Ok, poor guy. He has two big sisters, both princess infatuated. (As an aside, this is amazing to me. If anything, we have avoided the princess fanfare that seems to invade any and all stores. Nonetheless, they Love princesses. Something inborn???) On top of the two sisters, he has some Lebanese heritage (by way of Vietnam??). My dear grandmother was Lebanese. We love ALL Mediterranean food.

These two pics sum it up.

"I'm happiest in my tiara."

"Who says I can't eat hummus with my entire hand?"

Mondays

2008-09-29T21:05:00.003-05:00

We love Mondays around here. Monday is Ryan's day off, and it is always great. Tuesdays are a bit hectic, as we basically feel like today is a Saturday but then tomorrow is a full week day as usual. The girls go to school Tuesday/Thursday, so it's a fast turn around. Today had the additional benefit of Missy taking Molly ALL day to play with Rosemarie. It was SO quiet around here with just Charlotte & Lewis. Molly is for sure the voice of the family; it was fun to hear the quieter one speak up. Thanks Missy!! As soon as Molly got home she said: 1) When can I do that again!? and 2) I missed seeing you all day, Mommy. That is what made my day today!

Catching Up Part 2

2008-09-28T22:35:00.003-05:00

Lewis sleeping on Daddy after a few rough nights. A rare moment now as he transitions out of baby-hood.

A cute, typical Lewis face while eating. If he likes something, he likes to say "(Yu)mmmmm." He had his first bagel after the Juvenille Diabetes walk on Saturday. He was FULL of Yummmms for that!! Not Absolute Bagels, but good (Einstein) none-the-less.

Hey, Check Out my first Hot Wheels! Thanks, Clementes!

Below are some pics from the 5K Juvenille Diabetes Walk we did just yesterday. Christopher, a good friend of ours, is such a trooper with the disease, and the girls love him & his fam. Molly walked the first mile I'd say. Ryan's shoulders got a good workout the next two. It was a blast!

Is Anyone Still Checking?

2008-09-27T20:33:00.007-05:00

Ok, Ok...sorry I have been such a lame poster. In my defense, I do notice that quite a few blogs that lead up to adoption also have large gaps once the little cutie arrives home. As Stacy pointed out, my last post spoke of these free hours I now have--well, they go pretty dang fast! And I try to do ALL errands possible, plus a walk (only exercise for now!) in those hours.

Let me say first, before I post a few pics showing our goings on, that little man Lewis is doing really well. His sleeping continues to improve which is the greatest blessing of all. I think that shows us that he continues to adjust and feel really comfortable here. He just loves his sisters, hates diaper changes, doesn't play with any toys, throws food off his high chair, and wants to hold anyone's hands to walk, walk, walk. All signs of a typical 14 month old. He is just too cute, loves being tickled, still loves eating (for the most part), and now loves his Grammie as well as Gigi & Grandaddy. Grammie (Deb) came down for a last minute visit this month; we all LOVED having her here (we gave her a lovely back to school cold though), but it was a great visit. Lewis will for sure remember you, Grammie, on your next visit--hopefully that one will be permanent! He saw Gigi & Grandaddy again this week, and he totally remembers them too. Fun signs. We have had him for exactly three months; it feels like he's always been here.

Here I will test my Blogger skills: a few pics with explanation.

Olympic B-Day Party for M&C

25 kids; 24 adults

Arboretum Visit

Opening Fall H&M Wardrobe sent by Cynthia

And now I will have to start another post (if all remains quiet on this front) because Blogger does NOT making posting pics easy. Does anyone have a tip on this? Is this anyone else's problem? Is anyone still there? More soon.

Back to "School"

2008-09-09T11:59:00.005-05:00

Yeah! 10 hours of the week I have just one child. I love it! Of course it looks totally different this year; my trips to the gym are still not reinstated (don't want to leave Lewis at their child care quite yet), and my romantic lunches at Chiloso's with Ryan have yet to resume. Oh yes, and the long mornings at Texas Roast...well, that goes without saying. But, I did get the kitchen cleaned up this morning which is always a productive thing to do. I even listened to the sermon I missed on Sunday while doing this. That was a treat that would not/could not happen with all three. (It's free if you ever have such an opportunity at http://www.trinityharborchurch.com/, then the Resources tab. Our pastor is great. And hot!)

So, now that I've said hello, I'd better use the next two hours for some more exciting productivity. Here are a few pics. The girls were obviously vaclempt on their first day of school.

I love my new tractor! Thanks Tennessee friends, Wib & Jen.

Pretend it's Sept 1

2008-09-03T23:16:00.005-05:00

Yes, my baby girl is 3 now. I just saw a pic of her from the beginning of summer; amazing how that sweet baby fat falls off right before the third birthday (not that she ever had that much!). Charlotte is so fun--she can entertain herself, loves her alone time, imagines herself to be a different character every half day or so, and is full of laughs for the right (or totally wrong!) joke. So, here's happy b-day to Charlotte (two days late of course). AND, Happy Anniversary to Katherine & John (due in November!).

NAPS!

2008-08-30T21:04:00.002-05:00

Lewis has napped for two days now! This may just save our sanity (my sanity). Hoorah, yeah, hear my excitement!!! We won't get into the ugly details that led up to this accomplishment.
We are in Waco at my parents for an end of summer extravaganza. Nachos for dinner...maybe some ice cream yet to come; there are 6 Ben & Jerry options just 3 feet from me. Danger. That's what the built in work out room is for, right?? Better run "relax!"

Quick Note

2008-08-26T07:32:00.002-05:00

Happy Boy! Tried to write a post here, but I am being summoned to find a Princess Presto dress for Charlotte and they seem to want breakfast, these demanding people! Anyway, quick pic of cute boy. He looks bigger, right? He should! I think I already mentioned that his new favorite food is the garlic, dill cheddar. If I get it out of the fridge, he goes absolutely crazy. What a perfect fit!

TANSTAAFL

2008-08-22T23:13:00.002-05:00

Okay, so I started this post last night (by finding the Title) & then Lewis started crying. He didn't stop until we brought him to bed with us; I like to call him Pinball Wizard. 360's throughout the night. Lovely indeed.
At the time I started the post, I had just spent two hours of typical Printer Dialogue. I have always had hard times with my printers; in college I remember having to restrain myself from throwing the Dot Matrix out the window. I was very ungrateful for the gift my parents had given me; I seriously felt like I was dating the thing & I hated it. Since then, of course, printers are of a whole differnt breed & they actually interface with your computer instead of acting like they have never seen a computer before. Thus the reason I thought I could set up the "free" color printer Ryan received when he purchased his Mac a year ago for a quick color print out of M&C's b-day party invites. Not unreasonable; I was proud of myself for being willing to set up new hardware for a party; most of you know I am not the kid b-day party type. But, I knew it would be easy; printer/PC no problem. That is, unless it is a "free" printer you have received. Of course, it was from Apple, the lover of all people, and the loved by most people I know. Well, even Mr. Apple knows there are no free lunches. The "free" HP printer he was giving away last year was evidently a bum printer that HP put out; one in which the BLACK ink doesn't work. Nice. So, 2 hours later I figured out a way around it, but not without a bit of funny frustration--the web was full of people who got this printer that just didn't quite work. So, can you figure out the title? Who knew there was an acronym for this syndrome.
As for Lewis, the reason most of you read this blog, he is great but sleepless as ever. I will have some cute pics tomorrow. For now must make up for the lost sleep caused by last night's arcade.

Incomplete Diaper Bag; Need Camera

2008-08-18T21:07:00.004-05:00

So, I need to get back in the saddle and have a camera with me at least 50% of the time. Tonight while at Mi Cosina (best Mex in Dallas), Lewis had refrieds on one side of his face; guac on the other. He loves his food!! And he loves any Mexican people we meet, men or women. Understandably, they remind him more of Vietnam than we do! Pics to come, one of these days. The next 3 should produce some fun ones; we are heading to Austin for a few hazy, lazy summer days to Camp Adrian (Marian, Finn, & John Adrian's house, my sister & fam). She has graciously offered to do 2 on 4, not 1 on 3. We will have four kids total; Marian is willing to split the work & host (Ryan will stay home). Kind on her part indeed! Looking forward to poolside with all the crew.
J

A Week

2008-08-17T21:00:00.003-05:00

Alright (Allison), so it's been a week since my last post. And such a long one at that! Ryan and I had a great anniversary celebration in Dallas on the 10th. That morning, Lewis was baptized (by Ryan)--he is a child of the covenant through grace; we are so thankful for our community here & the ways in which he & the girls will experience God's grace through Christ's body.
I'm not sure what to relay from the rest of the week; it is a blur interrupted by a few fun Olympic moments. We were in Dallas all day Monday as well while my parents kindly kept the kiddos (even Lewis!). That was indeed the highlight; reflecting on 10 years--remembering each anniversary, where we were, & the events that surrounded each one. For example, our first one was spent in London as we returned from a summer in Uzbekistan where Ryan was training teachers. We were glad to be in London on several counts! Our fifth was spent at the shore in the generous Giamonna's condo--I was 8 months pregnant & on the way back to NY the muffler fell off the car & we sat for hours waiting up on a hill for our tow, arguing with AAA if we were technically ON the Garden State or on the exit ramp. (They don't service the Garden State Pkwy fyi.) We returned just in time for a lovely, if not very warm (in our Brooklyn apt), dinner with the Tompkins family to celebrate Deb's fiftieth. Yes, our Grammie is younger than yours! Anyway, it was fun trying to remember all 10 summers, even the time we both totally forgot (8th year, we were at Camp of the Woods).
Then, to put the perfect end on the week, I met Molly & ML (Baylor roomies) in Waco for a girls 18. 18 hours that is; it was great!
Lewis continues to adjust. He was funny when we arrived in Waco, looking around Mom's house wondering if this was his next destination or what. His sleep reflected that, of course, but overall he is doing really, really well. He loves the girls, totally follows Ryan & me with his eyes everywhere we go, and is crawling & into everything. He is an absolute JOY & I swear he repeats words back to us; I think he's a pretty smart dude. He loved the cheese I gave him tonight--garlic & dill cheddar. That must make him smart, right?
That's the quick & dirty update. Will try to write more regularly which will surely lead to better sentence structure or something good!
J

08.08.08

2008-08-08T23:30:00.000-05:00

Happy Lucky Day. And Happy 10 years to Ryan & me.
That is amazing!

A Nap...

2008-08-07T11:44:00.001-05:00

...on mama in the Mei Tai. And so it goes.

Happy Birthday Deb (Grammie)

2008-08-06T20:42:00.003-05:00

We all miss Grammie & hope they are in TX soon! Their house is on the market in Oneonta & they are soon Lone Star bound. Might it sell soon--we need you!! Molly is concerned about Melanie though--she knows that Aunt Mel must be really missing her & she hopes she can get to TX soon as well. At least she is confident, right? Love to all the NY crew! Wish we could pop upstate this August as usual!

18 minutes

2008-08-05T22:25:00.003-05:00

So, I've been a little off on the blogging as I suspected might be the case. I have the utmost of excuses, however--18 minutes. The number refers to the exact amount of time Lewis spent napping today, and that is par for the course if it's a day at home. Yes, I know I blog at night usually; however, if I can even spell tonight it's a miracle. The success: everyone is alive & still wants to be in this family, I think. I have ordered the book Laran praised, "Good and Angry." We'll see if it delivers--book review to come in my usual 6 months. So, this reverts to a boring diapers & naps blog. Take it or leave it; I have nothing left. Hope to see you in a few days after we've been on the road more; naps are superb in motion! The tension: gas & emissions vs. sleep & peace. Just how many drive-thru errands can one run in a day? Bank, dry cleaners, coffee, pharmacy--I am totally up to date on these due to road warrior napper. Why can we not have a drive-thru deli who will just get me some milk & bread. And wine perhaps. They would make millions. Maybe I can open that store right after I open the wonderful brunch place here in Rockwall with Kitchenette caliber biscuits, English muffins, & pancakes. Will get back to you in 5. (years.)

And yes, you can get your flu shot at a drive-thru.

A Night Out

2008-07-31T10:38:00.005-05:00

Laurin, Vickey, me, Allison, Erika

We were able to get out Friday evening, Lewis in tow, for a good-bye dinner for our good friends Allison & Heath. Even in the 'burbs good-byes happen & are sad! Allison has been a great friend; we met shortly after our move here. The pic includes some of the regulars on our playdates--I rarely have Rockwall friends pics to post--we are always surrounded by too many kiddos for cameras. So, cheers to fun nights out which include salsa dancing--it was a great encouragement (except for the good-bye part)!!

Flashback

2008-07-29T22:28:00.003-05:00

Wow. I cannot believe I got a video to upload to Blogger. I have tried this SO many times. Anyway, this is a SWEET video our friend Wade made for us of the arrival at DFW (father of Lillie from China). While this may seem like a while ago, it still feels pretty recent (in some ways) around here, as I would say we are in "newborn phase" still in terms of chaos & adjustment. We are all doing great though, despite the transition, and Lewis seems very, very happy with his new situation. He loves the girls; they can really make him laugh which is helpful when I am scouring the kitchen for the next thing he will eat. Four weeks ago he was eating rice cereal; now he is baby foodie--the more balsamic the better. He will eat his own "baby" food, and he will all the more excitedly eat something off my plate. Keep it up! I will be interested to see if he's put on the lbs. He might not be the only one--nothing like the newborn phase w/o the natural weight loss plan of nursing!? Sorry guys & non-baby people. But, it's true! With that, I sign off. Good night and happy video viewing. It's about 4 minutes. Love, J

A Few Highlights

2008-07-23T21:32:00.007-05:00

Now that I have three kids, I have considered ways to politely bow out of blogging. They say never make any decisions during a major transition phase, so I will hold on the blog decision as well. You would laugh at the number of major decisions I have felt strongly about these weeks. You can guess some of them I'm sure. (4, never!, etc. I feel that that one will stick though!)
Instead, I will just use bullets, a favorite. That is a good "transition phase" tool.

A few highlights from the past 2 weeks:

A visit from Marian, John, & Finn to meet nephew/cousin Lewis. Fun as always!
Delicious meals from caring, supportive friends!
Hearing from friends long distances away--Mercy & Paul, Amanda H., Cynthia, Laran (stopping by tomorrow!!), Don & Glenda, many chats with Ryan's parents & Melanie, Skype calls with Joel & Natasha (very interesting with 3 under 5), Stacy on one of her long drives!
Making it to church this past Sunday all on my own with the kids. On time & we remembered everyone's shoes this time.
Receiving a video from the Dunns of our arrival at DFW and remembering all the friends & family there to welcome Lewis & us home. Overwhelming! I wish it was easier for me to post videos on this blog.
Seeing KK & fam not once but twice since returning. We forgot to take any pics!
Trying to keep 2 loud girls quiet--running to do that right now as they're pulling into the garage with Ryan (I can hear their voices through the outside walls).

Good night!

Happy 1st Birthday

2008-07-21T21:46:00.004-05:00

I can't believe he's ONE already! It feels like he just got here. Seriously, it is hard to imagine that his little life already has a year on it. We know so much about the day to day happenings of our other two's first years. It's for sure different and very sweet at the same time. Hopefully he will remember the vanilla butter cream cupcake over the five viles of blood he had drained today for testing. I'm sure all is well, just standard adoptee tests. The woman at LabCorp looked at me like, "what kind of Mom are you--it's his birthday." I know, I know. Looking back, though, we have eased up. Can I tell you that Molly had a cinnamon-raisin bagel for her 1st birthday treat! To our credit, we did attempt to go to Cafe Lalo which had an hour wait...so, sweet bagel on the Hudson instead. Happy Birthday, Lewis! Now that you're one, I bet you can sleep through the night big boy!!

A Week Already?

2008-07-16T09:35:00.002-05:00

We are taking it one day at a time, and if the goal is just making it through, we are doing superb. I think I can manage three kids if I don't have to do anything else. Well, I did just pay the bills while attempting to upload these pics. That is the one thing I will accomplish today. Getting a "final notice" is always a good motivator--don't these people know that some of us travel!? (Fate Water is a little zealous for its payments to say the least.)
Anyway, the little guy is doing just great! He is totally getting his sleeping together, as are we, and he seems to be adjusting to his new home. His naps are more like little snoozes, however, and he just woke up from this one. So, thus ends this post. More to come. As you can see, the girls love him. Molly particularly is often in his personal space, being a great big sis.

Day Out

2008-07-12T21:03:00.002-05:00

Thanks to the Scheele's for a GREAT day out! M & C had an absolute ball visiting Mr. Scheele at the hospital, hitting the playground, Chick-fil-A picnic all followed by the spray park! Have you ever known sweeter 7th graders!? I know, I know Samuel & Peter; none of your 7th grade friends are reading this though.

Lewis is doing really well. It's good I'm posting tonight; last night was a bit of the overwhelmed blues, but today has been good. Of course my mom is still here though, so tomorrow night may be a different story again. Anyway, he has been absolutely great during the days; loving his surroundings, watching the girls, army crawling over to anything he sees. He smiles and laughs so easily, especially following any kind of communication he can get from us. He has learned to clap in the past 24; he catches on so quickly, smart boy! And his baby lag seems to be doing better as of last night.

We are so thankful for all your encouragement. We are definitely still in new baby; hibernation mode, but I am looking forward to worshipping together with our friends tomorrow indeed! What a great way to re-enter.

Please Sleep!

2008-07-10T21:50:00.005-05:00

Ryan and I have taken turns the past two nights, fighting our own jetlag & baby's jet lag; two incompatible mates. The adjustment to "home" for Lewis has seemed rather remarkable to him; he seems to know something is up here. He is having similar reactions as to when we first got him--night terrors and difficulty being comforted at night. However, during the day he's great and just loves, loves watching the girls run around him being as loud as ever. Shelly, you were right about that! We kept him on schedule today and he napped well (thx for praying!), so hopefully that will help as will the added time here and some slow one on one time with Mom & Dad. It was a treat for him to see Allison today also; a "familiar face" who could speak some Vietnamese to him. He will pull through as we all will. For now, though, it's my shift, so I'd better head that way. J

And now for some Sleep

2008-07-08T22:07:00.001-05:00

Well, we will dream anyway. We are so glad to be home! I don't have the clear vision to write much, but just to say that we made it and any advice on baby time travel is welcome. My aunt was at the airport today and has some fun pics here on her blog. Thanks Nancy! Thanks to all who made it so special arriving here today; very overwhelming! J

Tokyo; Home Sweet Home

2008-07-07T20:27:00.003-05:00

It's amazing how two and a half weeks in Vietnam can make Tokyo feel like home. We are glad to be here, hanging in the Admiral's Club. Ryan feels he can't go back to regular traveling again which is why we will not be air traveling again for years I fear. Now that we know such a place exists--a land with free ice coffees, comfy chairs, working A/C, and ticket agents who come over to your seat and help you work out your ticket--this is the hidden world, the Shangri-La of airports. So I digress.

I would now like to offer a huge thanks to all of you who have read the blog during our traveling adventure. Your posts & emails have been greatly encouraging; friends in the adoption world, your input has been so helpful. Thank you! For instance, what would I have done without the Mei Tai!? Great call Jessica; Lewis is snoozing in it now as I type. This has been a great time, and we are now very excited to get home, reunite with the girls, and crash in our own space. I know the adventure is no where near over, as Lewis has no idea what is about to hit him--two big girls waiting to pounce, a new home to explore, and days to become nights somehow.

We are heading to our flight soon. So far, no one has lost their peanuts. J

Maybe it is the Sea?

2008-07-06T08:04:00.005-05:00

The trip to Ha Long Bay was absolutely beautiful. Aboard the Jasmine Junk, we toured one of the natural Wonders of the World. It was indeed a wonder. Scenery like we've never seen before & won't again until we return. I am out again and left my camera cord in the room, so pics will have to wait. Ryan & Lewis are again resting after a stunning but eventful two days.

Our first day at sea was great; the drive there uneventful except for the indescribable passing on the two lane highway to Ha Long. Let's just say: 2 lanes, 3 abreast passing not rare. Swerved at 50 mph to miss a water buffalo in our lane. All this of course with no carseat to speak of in Vietnam. Once aboard we enjoyed a fresh seafood lunch, an excursion to a beach where we climbed steps to the top of one of these amazing peaks (the Japanese tourists kindly applauded when we made it to the top, Lewis strapped onto me in the carrier--it was the steepest climb you've ever seen), followed by a boat trip to see a fishing village. This village is entirely on water--800 people live in floating houses. We saw many children lounging in hammocks on their tiny patios (piers). They will grow up never touching land, only rowing from house to house to visit friends. They all have TVs & cell phones though, with an elementary school, similar to Little House, floating near by. It was a mind blowing visit to that village. Then the second day we ended up on a smaller boat for the day, one with no A/C and little shade. Ryan & a group went out kayaking while I stayed behind with Lewis. When the crew returned we were happy to see Daddy indeed...until we heard from him that he had officially lost his breakfast directly from kayak to sea. Yes, it must have been as bad as it sounds! Poor guy. He has continued to have one of the worst stomach bugs ever. Lewis & I suffer from it today but no where near the extent of Ryan. Needless to say, we were glad to hit land today even if it involved a three hour road trip back to Hanoi. Amazingly no one lost anything on that jaunt. We even had one of the guys on the boat who spoke good English write a note in Vietnamese to our driver who spoke zero English, "Please pull over; I am about to vomit." We definitely need to save that for the baby book. Along the way, several people said, "Maybe it is the sea." Mind you, we were in a BAY. There aren't too many waves in a bay.

This all leads into some great news though. Pat Ross, travel agent extroadinair, has secured us seats on Monday night's flight from Hanoi to Tokyo to DFW. Amazing route; earlier than expected. We are ecstatic to return home. Our time here has been great, and we would not have traded the extra time with only Lewis. Of course, many hotels & many restaurants w/o high chairs lead us to be excited about home. We know that our time one-on-one with Lewis will not happen once reunited with the girls, but he will be okay; we have had some great times & are learning his loves.

His favorite thing at the moment is to make a noise or a gesture and then we repeat it. Two nights ago on the boat he was rolling with laughter; he would shake his head like a "no" shake and we would repeat it. He LOVED it; died laughing. I think he finally sees us as possible communicators when the past week all he's heard us say sounds like "blah, blah, blah" to him. During his happy awake hours, we play this game a lot. Or banging on the table & we respond with the same number of bangs. A favorite. I'm sure the other guest in the restaurant love this too. All to say, we are glad to return & glad for the time here with him. Thanks to you who have faithfully prayed for our time here & our return home. We can happily report that God has answered these prayers in the way we & many of you have petitioned. We know it will be quite the transition to two big sisters; we could not be more excited to see them & their interaction with the new brother. That will be a trip indeed!

We'll be in touch; maybe from Tokyo!

Full of Joy in Hanoi

2008-07-03T09:40:00.003-05:00

As we're biding time, waiting for all the i's to be dotted & t's to be crossed, Hanoi is a pretty cool place to be. As the capital of Vietnam, Hanoi is a bit smaller than Saigon but feels more cosmopolitan. Expats abound, and Aussies are everywhere. Food has been great here; that's one joy we're literally full of! We've eaten three meals a day here for the first time, probably because our breakfast here isn't quite so lavish as before. But, there are actually options for it, as tonight we had our best Indian dinner ever and for half the price. I know, you don't really want to hear about the food, but if you know us you know that it really helps pass the time.

The great news on the adoption front is that today we received Lewis' visa from the USA; he is officially an immigrant to the US. As soon as he passes through customs in LA or DFW he will be an American citizen. This step is the final hurdle in the process over here and one that can be precarious. The Consulate was gracious today and granted our group's visas this afternoon, pre-4th of July day off. Why are we still here? Our tickets were originally booked to return 10 days from now; we have succeeded (Mom has succeeded) in getting flights for Wednesday night, arriving Dallas on Friday. Yes, I think it's the longest trans-world flight ever with some pretty amazing layovers! We are hoping for a tighter route to open up, but as I've told myself these past days, many people in many countries wait much longer for just about everything from getting their homes back to getting their children back. That has been helpful.

We are taking advantage of the time here in Lewis' birth country to visit Ha Long Bay tomorrow. We will ride about three hours by car to reach the bay & then board a "junk" cruise ship for two nights. The bay is supposed to be amazing. Thanks to the Cooks for tipping us off to this junket. They have been everywhere, and Bill says his kayak voyage into a lagoon in the bay ranks at the top of his list. Ryan is beside himself. He & Lewis are upstairs sleeping while I write to you from a cafe next door, currently blaring Amy Winehouse. Cheers.

Hanoi

2008-07-01T05:19:00.002-05:00

Three days out of the orphanage. What's left for Lewis to try? How about a trans-country flight.

Yesterday we flew from Saigon (Ho Chi Minh City) to Hanoi, the capital of Vietnam. It's here that we have to wait on Lewis's visa - permitting him to travel to the United States as an immigrant. When we go through customs after we land on U.S. soil, Lewis will become a citizen of the United States.

Lewis increasingly comes out of his shell and demonstrates his limitless curiosity. He is into everything, has figured out that the remote control changes channels, loves to play with the telephone, and loves to flip through books. He has some fascination with paper.

As I type Lewis is starting to put things in his mouth. This is a good thing. We were surprised that Lewis wasn't putting anything in his mouth, which is unusual for an eleven month old. Oral sensing is an important part of childhood development, and we are enjoying watching Lewis gnaw on the hotel remote control.

Lewis has also been taking well to solids. Rice cereal, bananas, pears, and a little bread are all new to his diet. When we think about it we are again overwhelmed that he is experiencing so many things for the first time. Astonishingly, he is taking it in stride.

Good Morning Vietnam

2008-06-29T01:10:00.002-05:00

This is kind of a funny existence, passing time in a hotel room across the world. Fortunately these weeks will be spent in the two largest cities in the country, giving us access to lots of stuff just outside our hotels. Overall it is good, allowing us to have slow, one on one time with Lewis, letting him get to know us and us him. He is still enamored with the smallest thing. The paper Breakfast Menu, for example, is one of his favorite things to look at and turn over in his hands. He really seems to like paper & books in general (not being read to yet, just feeling the texture of Ryan's book). A good sign, I'm sure.

His nights have been a little rough since the first one. It seems that he is very happy with us while he is awake, and when he is sleeping maybe his sub-conscience lets him mourn his losses. He has lost everything familiar and the only people he's ever known. The more time we spend in the coming weeks building "attachment" the better off he should be. A plus indeed of hotel living. What else are you going to do!? It's like a throw-back to the newborn phase; sitting around staring at your baby, unable to really get out and do much. It's different in that physically I feel fine, and I'm not tied to his feeding schedule--Ryan can give him a bottle too, unlike two very particular girls I know (M&C).

Today is our last day in Saigon (Ho Chi Min). We will make the best of all the inexpensive shopping around here (Ryan is loving that!). We promised some Vietnamese dress up dresses to the girls. Interestingly, most historical stuff in Vietnam is just that, history. Not many ancient things have made it past the territorial fights of this country. The mall across the street, however, is still standing so I'd better run.

Settling In

2008-06-27T09:05:00.004-05:00

Today it felt as if we have had Lewis for a week. He still doesn't know his "new" name, so when we refer to him it's hard to say Lewis...we've been saying Khang, or Lewis Khang, or Ryan's preferred name, Buddy. I can see how that develops--when you're just not sure what to call someone, Buddy works. We're just not totally sure what to call Lewis Khang Vinh Pham Freeman Tompkins. Anyway...Buddy is now crying, so this may be brief. (Seriously, Lewis it will be, not Buddy (Lewis Vinh Freeman Tompkins officially, for short. Sarcasm.).)

We've had a busy day, but good. I think we're working on the bonding thing; if Lewis never wanting to be put down means bonding we're definitely in the top category. I think it's more like he's really feeling the weight of the changes. He is still totally overwhelmed when we go out, and looking around like crazy, but it's amazing how it all seems a little more normal to him even after one day. I think as long as he is being held, tightly, by someone he is okay. He didn't nap much today, so tonight may be rough in that reverse logic baby sleep pattern kind of way.

As for us, today marked the beginning of our more authentic delve into Vietnamese food. For the most part we've relied on hotels or the guide book for suggestions. These have all been good, but catered more to western tastes (though Asian cuisine). Tonight was Pho 24; it was great! Any restaurant suggestions from former or fellow travelers are recommended! It's kind of strange relying on eating out for every meal; we've had our breakfasts included at every hotel. They've been great for the most part. Lunch usually is a Vietnamese iced coffee (SO yummy!) and then dinner out.

We're in Ho Chi Min till Monday; all papers should then be good for travel to Hanoi. We'll spend the weekend exploring this area, hanging out in the room, and teaching Lewis about crawling, reaching, and maybe some eating. He had his first bath today. He totally now knows the word & action "splash." I think when it's a first experience plus the word, he picks it up super fast. When Ryan got back from a paperwork errand, I asked Lewis to show him a splash. He totally made a "splash" on the bed for Ryan. Very impressive smart little boy!!

Have a great Friday over there; heading to bed soon on this end. J

13 Hours

2008-06-26T08:54:00.005-05:00

Okay, this little guy is SUCH a trooper! Just a mere thirteen hours ago (this morning!!), he was hanging out in his walker in one of the two rooms where he has spent the entirety of his life, all eleven months of it. That is a long time to be in two rooms. Think of your average eleven month old; more than two rooms! So, at 8 AM Can Tho time, we arrive to pick up little Lewis. He seems pretty happy to see us; no obvious reservations. I have to say, it was a very emotional time for me (J), as we took Lewis (Khang) and his three friends away with us. The nannies there have been very good to these babies, and they are torn I'm sure when so many leave in one month. So, after some pictures and a good-bye (he doesn't really know good-bye; he hasn't really come & gone much yet), we depart. The look on his face as we crest the doorway leading down the stairs was priceless, sheer awe--"we are going THIS way...there is a way beyond this door...I've never been this way before. hmmm...looking up, out, and all around!" As we then leave the main entrance to the orphanage, the daylight hits him and he is again astonished. The looks are full out dismay; "what in the heck is out here...this is quite different...there is a lot I haven't seen I think." His head is just in constant slow motion, looking all around.

So, we proceed from this moment of revelation to then board our mini-bus and head to the municipal building. Remember, SE Asia (as Justin put it) is sensory overload indeed. And that is for a traveled adult. Imaging Lewis--in a bus, moving, twenty motor-scooters in view (at the very least) at all times, racing by our window. Wow.

We move through the Giving & Receiving ceremony smoothly, re-board our bus, and return to our hotel to prepare for checkout. Only at this moment does he show the signs of being overwhelmed. He lets the saddest cry out for a few seconds, huge crocodile tears running down his face--it was the sense that he just needed to let it all out. He was quickly comforted, however, just by being held tightly. He immediately fell asleep. So did Ryan.

So, it's now only 11 AM and we checkout from the hotel in Can Tho, proceeding immediately to Ho Chi Min (Saigon). We drive for about five hours; these babes are amazing. They are, of course, taking it all in and probably in shock. No crying. For sure, not your average bus ride with four babies and no DVDs! So, for these five hours Lewis plays some, naps some, finally takes a bottle. Then we arrive at our destination--Times Square, Vietnam. Hello. Two rooms this morning; Neon Urban tonight. He performed beautifully. Tied safely around Mama, he felt free to look up, up, up. What in the world must this poor guy be thinking! We ate dinner at a cool cafe serving up some thin crust pizza, something that did Ryan & me much good; being SE Asia, electro punk was playing in the foreground of the cafe, just to add to the experience. After quite the day, Lewis is sleeping (for the time being). I am just so proud of him and so amazed at his desire to take it all in. He is so observant, so ready to try new things, and surely so overwhelmed. He is an answer to much prayer, both that he is with us now and that he is just the right one. We are overjoyed; he is too, even as a techno dance party is held three floors above his sweet little head.

First Date

2008-06-25T03:31:00.005-05:00

The day that we have long awaited finally arrived. It was an exceptional joy and a little overwhelming to meet the little boy that we have prayed for since we started this process over a year-and-a-half ago.

The orphanage is a little off the beaten path right next to the Mekong River. The building seems rather old, but it is as clean as can be thanks to a humble staff that are very committed to caring for these children. In the moments of meeting these children, one couldn't help but be reminded that the staff of the orphanage cares for these children, builds relationships with them, and loves them only to hand them over to foreigners.

Lewis is a riot. He seems to be the oldest child in the orphanage, and he seems to think that he owns the place. He does a little army crawl across the tiled floor, seeks attention from anyone who will give it, and is very quick with a rather toothy smile. He pops wheelies in his walker, in which he loves to fly around. He is as cute as can be.

Tomorrow we go through a giving and receiving ceremony conducted at a government office here. Afterwards, all four families who are going trough the same process proceed together by mini-bus back to Ho Chi Minh City. Four families, all our luggage, four new children who have never been in a car, and a four hour drive. Yikes!

We are now going to attempt to load a slide show on which you should be able to click and see all of today's pics. We hope it works and you can see how CUTE he is!

Smokin' the Bong in the Mekong

2008-06-24T18:58:00.004-05:00

We are happy to report that our trip has gone exceedingly well. No delayed flights, no lost luggage, no missed car rides.

Everywhere is the smell of incense. Most homes and businesses have a small shrine to a god before which people offer gifts of fruit, money, and incense to petition the god for blessing. As a result, the air itself seems to be scented with the smell of burning incense. This reminded Ryan of his days as a resident advisor (RA) at the University at Buffalo. Incense was the preferred choice to cover the scent of marijuana.

Driving yesterday from Ho Chi Minh City to Can Tho (a five hour drive not including the hour and a half wait for the ferry) provided our first opportunity to see the sea of humanity that is Vietnam. Vietnam is 1/27th the size of the United States, but has almost 1/3 its population. On the entire drive, there was no point where the business district along the highway stopped, except for the occasional rice field which was littered with people working. I can't think of anywhere in the U.S. where if you drove for five hours you would not be able to escape population density.

The vast majority of people travel by motorbike (similar to a Vespa). Honda makes one called the Om, which seems to be the one of choice. We can discern very few noticeable traffic patterns, and crossing the street here is a leap of faith. At most times, if you look left or right, the street looks like the beginning of the NYC Marathon, except everyone is on a motorbike. You basically close your eyes and run.

Everyone has been exceedingly friendly, and like most developing countries that we have visited they are amazingly happy despite living in poverty. It's a good reminder that money doesn't buy happiness.

We're off to the orphanage this morning to meet Lewis. Can't wait!

First Class

2008-06-21T01:29:00.002-05:00

Two words: First Class. Leveraging 250,000 American Advantage Miles, we were able to fly first class to Vietnam (it took eight to ten years to earn that many miles). Ever wonder what happens behind that curtain of forbidden pleasure? Imagine someone sitting you down in a leather recliner, lining up your favorite TV shows and movies, and constantly asking what you need while you spend the next twelve hours lounging. Many of you are surely used to flying first class as a result of miles racked up through work, but this was the first time for us. Will we ever be able to fly coach again?

We're sitting in Tokyo's airport, having made 12 hours of our 22 hour journey. It's two in the morning Dallas time, but mid-afternoon here. That dissonance that is created when your body is telling you it's one time but your senses are telling you it's another is oh so unpleasant. We already miss the girls a little bit, but we are anxious to land in Vietnam, have a couple days to regroup, and then to pick our new son.

Ryan

P.S. Thanks to Wade for our early morning ride to DFW. That was the beginning of first class treatment with Starbuck's & scones waiting in his suburban.

Here We Go!

2008-06-19T23:51:00.002-05:00

Hopefully we will be able to successfully post from across the world in a few hours! Thanks for all your encouragement; surely the good-bye to the girls will be the hardest part for a while. All this craziness helped me forget to notice that I am seriously getting up there--35! More soon! Love, J

Tickets Booked

2008-06-18T15:01:00.002-05:00

It all came together! Visas arrived 15 minutes ago; I booked our Advantage Tickets 3 mintues ago! Amazing that we got advantage seats; it just doesn't usually work out that way! There is some risk...if our time in Vietnam gets extended because of any paperwork mishaps, we could be in a bind as we can only get back on available Advantage seats (limited to say the least)! But, we will all pray that Lewis' paperwork sails through smoothly and we are well on our legal way by the 14th. (I know, sob sob, I already miss my girls (seriously)!) Oh, and did I mention that we have 1st/Business seats on most of our flights?!? That's a first (except our one flight, Cynthia!); guess using my little AA credit card for 8 years has finally paid off. I believe God is in details whether they work out the way I want them to or not. I am just thankful He is working them out so smoothly. Keep praying for us, especially until I take time to do so myself. Got to run pack some more--at least I can leave my house now (was waiting for visas)!

High Gear!

2008-06-16T11:35:00.002-05:00

Our G&R is June 26!!!!!!!!! That is next week! We will leave at the end of this week most likely. Craziness. Booking tickets as I write.
Wow.

Need Suggestion

2008-06-14T10:39:00.003-05:00

1. What's a good fiction book you've read lately? Not too cheesy, but easy enough to read at the 12th hour on a plane.
Come on you readers, don't just lurk, post!
2. Any ideas for gifts for the Vietnamese staff people and officials? Small & lightweight.

WIP

2008-06-14T10:19:00.003-05:00

There is much "Work in Process!" It is craziness around here; do we all still need to eat? Real food at home? This could be a challenge!
Our visa application is underway, arrived in DC at 7:20 this morning. We're hoping to hear early next week that June 26 or July 10 is our G&R date. Evidently July 4 is a big holiday in Vietnam too. (JK, it's our offices that are closed.) July 26 would mean that we depart 1 week from today; that would be exciting but crazy. July 10 a little far off, but we are just so glad to be in this stage!! More later...off to finally try and screw this gate into the wall (TX regulations). Funny there were no regulations to birth a baby...

And NOW For the BIG News!

2008-06-12T11:54:00.002-05:00

WE ARE ON OUR WAY!!!!
Our pre-approval email from the consulate came this morning, and we are waiting for a Giving & Receiving date to be set in Vietnam. Dillon is trying to set this for June 26 or July 10. Soon or soon! We are on our way to Lewis, yeah!!!!!
Now for the 1000 details that must be accomplished...do you think the girls will be watching a few videos this weekend!?!
Also, we heard that 6 other families received the email today. There will be 7 families total traveling together, and 6 of us are picking up babies in Can Tho orphanage. That is a big group--we are super excited about this as well!! That means we seriously have to pack all of our stuff, Lewis' stuff, gifts for workers, & paperwork in 2 suitcases. Hmmm. Good thing it's 110 degrees over there; don't need a sweater. Better get going! J

No News is...No News!

2008-06-10T08:39:00.005-05:00

We've had a great time with our little Cynthie, and we are sad to see her go today. How fun to have a friend in town for just hanging out! We miss you already! Hope court (the day you get back) goes well. Yikes!

I'm not sure if it helps or hurts, but we got some super cute new pics of little Lewis. He is looking way too old; every morning we just check for the email that so far hasn't come. I do keep learning of more & more paperwork or required reading I haven't done yet, so I know there's good in it all. Surely I can cram like crazy though! Here are the pics...

Hey, Mom, where are you!?

Look at Me! Kind of Standing!?

Cynthia in the House!

2008-06-06T09:23:00.003-05:00

Molly has not stopped GOING since 2 PM yesterday when we picked up Cynthia at DFW. We are having a great time, though I'm not sure Cyn will get much of a break! We'll have to get out and about a little.
AND a BIG Congratulations to Aunt Melanie, Doctor of Physical Therapy! Yippee! I know the celebration yesterday in NYC was a blast. Can't wait to see you down here in Big D! Neither can Charlotte--she can't decide whether to call Cynthia by her name or by yours.

A Lewis Video! December 2007.

2008-05-31T20:30:00.001-05:00

2008-05-31T20:25:00.004-05:00

Shelly was so kind to seek us out and send this video they were finally able to upload. Thank you, thank you!
What a fun encouragement in the midst of waiting.